


The Best Things Come In Small Packages

by tizzytinkertilly



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Gen, I promise, Tikki goes on an eventful adventure, first fic, happy adventure, idk this is not planned well, it's getting a little angsty though, maybe the classmates, not much romance tbh more plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-25
Updated: 2018-07-14
Packaged: 2018-08-11 01:30:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7870294
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tizzytinkertilly/pseuds/tizzytinkertilly
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This was all Marinette's fault, and she knew it. If she hadn't tripped on that stupid black cat like a klutz, then she wouldn't have dropped her favourite bag.<br/>Her favourite bag that always had Tikki in it.<br/>The same favourite bag that was slowly drifting down La Seine with a sleeping red kwami snuggled up warmly inside it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> i'm so sorry this is a short short mess
> 
> it's my first fic and I'm trying

This was all Marinette's fault, and she knew it. If she hadn't tripped on that stupid black cat like a klutz, then she wouldn't have dropped her favourite bag.

Her favourite bag that always had Tikki in it.

The same favourite bag that was slowly drifting down La Seine with a sleeping red kwami snuggled up warmly inside it.

Marinette didn't know if magical guardians could drown, but she wasn't planning on finding out.

"Tikki!" Marinette hissed at the floating bag as loudly as she dared, not wanting to draw attention to herself. It was irritating that she couldn't shout and scream, which was what it usually took to wake Tikki up from a cookie coma, but there was little else she could do. People were already giving her strange looks and she didn't want to put Tikki in any more danger than she was already in by causing a massive fuss. There was always a chance that one of them could be Hawk Moth, and it could be serious trouble if he realised that Ladybug was without her Kwami.

The bag was getting further and further away and Mari could feel herself beginning to panic. Seeing as her purse was out of arms reach, Marinette resorted to jogging along the bank, hands cupped around her mouth as she whisper-yelled, watching in despair as the little pink bag meandered its way down the river.  
"Tikki!" She hissed, "Would you please wake up before you _actually_ start sleeping with the fishes? Tik-"

Marinette's voice cut off with a surprised shout as, for the second time that day, she fell flat on her face, nose hitting the concrete hard. She groaned, more at her bad luck than in pain. Inwardly, she wondered if she should consider getting her eyes checked, as apparently she could never see where she was going, and at this rate she was going to get a permanent bruise on her face. If she didn’t know any better, she’d say this was karma for dropping her living good luck charm in a river like an idiot. She almost wanted to laugh at her misfortune, when she heard a concerned and familiar voice ask her a question.

"Um, are you OK Marinette?"

Adrien smiled awkwardly at his classmate from where he was sprawled on the floor next to her, having also fallen over when they collided, and tried to be a gentleman by not laughing at her shocked expression. He wasn't doing very well; especially since the blush spreading across Marinette's face was kind of reminding him of a ripe tomato, though he didn't plan on sharing that thought out loud. Instead, he smiled kindly.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to bump into you, I was in a bit of a rush and wasn't looking where I was going." He looked around, "Aren't you usually with Alya around this time? You two are nearly always together, right?"

Marinette blinked. Her brain took a second to process the question, and then another as she registered that she needed to answer quickly before it became awkward. Frantically, Marinette waved her hands about, grasping enough at a sentence to blurt out, "Oh yeah...um... no Alya had to go tooooooo a... um... CLASS! A JOURNALIST CLASS! S-She went for extra practice, y'know, she wants to be a journalist...o-or you didn't know, but now you do so... that's... um yeah..." before she clamped her hand over her mouth, feeling her face turn another, deeper shade of red.

Adrien smiled warmly again (tomatotomatotomato) and stood up, brushing the dirt off of his designer jeans. He held a hand out for Marinette, who took it gratefully, and he pulled her up. There was a single moment of comfortable silence, before the two teens realised they were still holding hands and shot apart, looking sheepish. 

Adrien went to ask Marinette what she was doing by the river then if she wasn't hanging out with her friend, when a sudden buzzing noise coming from his pocket interrupted his thoughts. He cursed under his breath. According to the message, the Gorilla had told Nathalie of his escape. He had to get moving. Giving Marinette an awkward double thumbs up as he began to walk away, he said, "Oh, OK, that's cool. I... er guess I'll see you around then! Bye!"

He dashed off, opening his jacket slightly. Marinette sighed and waved. She turned back around and murmured, "OK, where was I... Oh right! Tikki! Tik- oh no..."

She realised suddenly she'd been struck by her bad luck again; Marinette's run in with Adrien Agreste had meant she'd completely lost sight of her bag, and by extension, her spotted companion. Marinette took a deep breath, opened her mouth and screamed.

Her day could not get any worse.

...

"-ease wake up before you _actually_ start sleeping with the fishes? Tik-"

Tikki's eyes shot open. That was Marinette's voice. She sounded like she was in trouble. Did she need her mask? Tikki reached for the clasp of the bag and yanked it open. Instantly water started to fill the bag, soaking both Tikki and her few remaining cookies. With a small squeak, the tiny Kwami quickly shut the bag back up again and, after taking a second to calm down, frowned.

How did she end up in a river? She'd been with Marinette just a minute ago and- Marinette! Where was Marinette? It was very unlikely that Mari had thrown her in the river, so something must have happened. What if she'd been kidnapped by Hawk Moth or an Akuma had attacked her or... or... worse! Tikki had to get to Marinette immediately.

Squeezing her eyes shut, Tikki phased through the bag, shivering from the slightly uncomfortable feeling. You would think after thousands of years, a Kwami would get used to the feeling of their atoms dissipating and rearranging, but no, it was still the weirdest sensation, like being ticked from the inside out. 

Quickly, Tikki grabbed the strap of Marinette's bag. She tried to drag the purse under the bridge she'd just passed, but she underestimated the strength of the current. The soaked bag was too heavy for her to lift, and what with both the water in and outside of the bag, the Chocolate Chip Triple Deluxe cookies and Marinette's phone, it was like an ant trying to move a concrete brick.

But, that didn't mean she could just leave it there. She was determined to save it.

Gripping the chain tighter with her tiny hands, Tikki tugged at the bag strap as hard as she could. It moved a little in the right direction, but it was slowly moving back into the current, so Tikki gritted her teeth and tried to pull it out of the water and fly it over to a small alcove under another, closer bridge. 

Instead, once that didn't work and she nearly sank her cargo, she tried a hopping method, bouncing the bag off the water to give it some more lift, and she finally reached the alcove after a few minutes of desperate struggling.

Tentatively, Tikki opened the bag in hope of a cookie. All that was left was a depressing pile of mush, so Tikki instead pulled out Marinette's phone to clean it. 

Sadly pushing the biscuit remains off the phone into the river, Tikki considered her options. She could leave the bag here to come back for it later, but she could forget where she'd put it or the weight of it could cause it to fall back into the river. She could try to pull the bag out of the alcove and then try to find Marinette while carrying it, but she wouldn't be able to stand the weight of it for very long and there was a chance she could be spotted by someone (no pun intended) or captured. She shivered as a memory of the 'Ali Incident' popped up in her head. She wouldn't be able to move through town very fast either. With a start she realised she didn't know how far she'd drifted down the river before she woke up.

She pushed the bag as far into the alcove as it would go, slipping the phone on top and quickly zipped up to peer over the bridge. Tikki let out a relieved breath. She knew where she was, but she was still pretty far from Marinette's house. She looked around for anywhere to hide the bag when she suddenly noticed Alya about to turn and walk down the bridge, presumably coming back from her journalism class. A sudden idea occurred to Tikki and she grinned.

As fast as she could manage, she emptied the remaining cookie mush into the river, put the phone back inside and closed the bag clasp securely. She carefully raised the bag above her head, somehow managing to get it safely inbetween her antennas, and began to float upwards, wobbling a little as she tried to keep her cargo balanced. Tikki lifted the bag up alongside the bridge and, just as Alya walked past, half-pushed-half-threw the bag hard as she could towards the young journalist, shooting back under the bridge immediately after to avoid being seen.

The bag landed in front of Alya's feet with a satisfying 'thump'. Alya stopped and looked down in surprise. 

"Oh!" She lent down to pick up the bag, looking around in confusion, "Mari's bag? What? Marinette? You here, girl?"

No one answered, though a passerby gave her a weird look for talking to herself. Tikki held her breath.

Alya frowned, putting her hand on her hip. "Nino, if this is some kinda prank, I will end your life right here, right now. I do not have time for your jokes today."

Still, no one answered. Alya, after a tense moment, hummed in an unconvinced tone, then sighed, mumbling something about ‘time wasting’ under her breath. She pulled a carrier bag out of her satchel and placed Marinette's soaked bag in it and, after a quick check that there was nothing else that mysteriously belonged to her friends around, Alya carried on walking down the bridge.

Tikki sighed in relief. Now the bag would get back to Marinette's house without Tikki struggling to haul it back to the bakery. Granted, Alya-mail was not an ideal way to get it there, but it was better than someone seeing her and causing a mass panic.

In the meantime, Tikki needed to find Marinette and quick, except she wasn't sure how she was going to make it to her. For all she knew, Marinette could be anywhere in Paris by now, so where was she supposed to start looking? Either way, Tikki couldn't stay away from Marinette for too long or it could end up in trouble for the both of them. Tikki sighed sadly. She already missed her chosen.

Another idea popped into Tikki's head as quickly as the first and she gasped. Alya was going to get to Marinette, or at least Marinette's house, eventually, so why didn't she just follow Alya? If Tikki was as lucky as history claimed, Alya might even go to see Marinette today, which would solve the separation problem quicker than she ever could've hoped. Tikki suppressed a shaky laugh as she zipped back up to the topside of the bridge. She looked back and forth a couple of times before spotting Alya walking down the path parallel to the river. She immediately shot after her, making sure to keep hidden as she did so. Hopefully, she would be back with her Marinette by the end of the day, and the whole incident would be forgotten like it never happened.

Hopefully, it would all be OK.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> in which Plagg likes cheese and Adrien is a bro

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well there's more after all hope you like it
> 
> This should have been uploaded earlier but school stuff got in the way sorry

Cat Noir bounded across the rooftops of Paris. 

Though he was keeping a wary eye out for any nearby black limousines, the leather clad superhero was enjoying himself. The birds-eye beauty of Paris never failed to amaze him and, not for the first time, he was struck with the thought of how lucky he was to be Plagg's chosen... ironically enough. 

How many people were out there that would love to be in his position? To be the beloved, powerful, leather-clad and very handsome protector of Paris? Too many to count, especially seeing as he was LB's partner in justice. Who wouldn't want to hang out with the coolest, most beautiful bugaboo alive? No one was as close to Ladybug as Chat Noir, no matter what nonsense Chloe tried to convince the press. 

Last he heard, the Parisian super-duo now had fans abroad in places as far away as China, thanks to Alya's constant Ladyblog updates. 

It was strange, really, to think that without Plagg, his life would be so different, and significantly more lonely. The Kwami's random appearance in his life had brought many new changes into his life and, though not all of them were great (the excess amount of cheese in his bag being one of them), he was glad to have so many new experiences that he hadn't been able to enjoy before Plagg permanently tucked himself in Adrien's jacket pocket. There was no way he'd have as much freedom, being Chat Noir meant that whenever anything got too much for him, he had the ability to run away, finally. He didn't have to slowly waste away in his bedroom, and he was beyond grateful.

Adrien was still thinking about what would be different if the cheese-loving mini God living in his jacket hadn't mysteriously appeared in his bedroom when he dropped into an alley and untransformed. He walked out confidently, whistling, as if Adrien Agreste hung out in alleys all the time (which he did, but he could always argue to Nathalie that 'he wasn't himself' if she ever found out) and made his way to the main street. 

Glancing around, he noticed Nino nervously messing with his hat across the road and Adrien waved excitedly as he ran over, trying to catch his friend's attention. The young DJ looked up in surprise.

"Hey, dude, what's up? I thought you couldn't make it?" Nino said. 

"There was a change of plans, my shoot was cancelled and I... uh... escaped before I could be rescheduled into more piano lessons or something. I wanted to support you, man." Adrien punched his friend softly on the arm, as he'd seen the other do to him countless times before.

Nino beamed, putting a hand on Adrien's shoulder, "Thanks, dude, you don't know how much this means to me. My folks couldn't make it, some work thing came up so they're stuck there until seven-something, so there was gunna be no one till you turned up bro! You aren't gunna get in trouble for this, are you?"

Adrien gave Nino a reassuring smile, "They won't even notice I'm gone."  
He pulled out some sunglasses from his back pocket, putting them on his face delicately.  
"I got you covered, Nino. Where should I sit?"

Nino grinned, his face lighting up. Absentmindedly, Adrien wondered if he should take a photo for Alya. She was always complaining that Nino never smiled in pictures, he just pulled his mouth taught and it infuriated her to no end.

"Dude, you have to sit at the front. You wanna hear the beat so loud it feels like your eardrums are going to burst if you want the best experience. Trust me."

"You just wanna make sure you can see me from the stage, don't you."

"Agreste, I have no idea what you are talking about."

The two boys laughed and joked as they walked into the park. Uneven rows of mix-matched plastic chairs were set up in front of a temporary stage, left over from a recent music festival, that had been adapted for the competition. On stage, a mix-deck was set up ('It's an old, practically ancient model, but it'll do. I'm pretty sure I can make her sing like she's Jagged Stone... Adrien, why are you laughing?') and a crude banner was hung above it that said 'Amateur DJ Freestyle Contest'. A few people milled around the chairs and stage and a few kids around the boys' age wore badges similar to Nino's that indicated that they were a part of the competition.

Adrien settled into the last seat on the first row. Nino was full of energy, in fact he was in his element, and he settled into telling Adrien all the details of his game plan, down to the exact notes and techniques, and Adrien was more than willing to listen to him, until a bored sounding voice told the competitors to 'line up behind the stage or something'. 

Nino's face instantly paled, nerves hitting him full force. He stood up, brushed off his jeans and took a deep, wobbly breath. Adrien summoned his most reassuring thumbs up and readjusted his sunglasses as Nino walked robotically to backstage. 

He really hoped his friend did well, he deserved it after all the practice he'd put in. Adrien couldn’t help but think of all the lunchtimes he’d seen Nino run straight to the music room, determined to practice while everyone else went home to eat. More than once since, Nino had been caught in afternoon lessons trying to eat his lunch in secret. If anything, it just proved how dedicated he was to his mix-deck and to his music. It was admirable, and to Adrien, more than a little inspiring.

As the commentator began to introduce the event, Adrien made himself comfortable on his plastic garden chair. He was there for the long run. 

...

"Stop beating yourself up, you did great!"  
Nino glared at Adrien and held up his plastic medal, holding it far away like it was going to bite him. 

"Third place, Agreste, by _two points_. Have those judges ever used a mix-deck? That other guy who got silver had no idea what he was doing, what I was performing on that stage was ten times more complicated and, that girl who won? I'm pretty sure that was her dad on the judging panel. Don't get me wrong, I know it's 'don't hate the player, hate the game', but I feel robbed, Adrien, _robbed_. Where's Ladybug and Chat Noir when I need them? I'm the victim of a crime."

Adrien smiled sympathetically and patted Nino on the back. He tried to think of something to cheer up his friend when an idea popped into his head and he excitedly tapped Nino on the arm. He said, beginning to grin, "Hey, y'know what we should do, take your mind off your almost-win-"

"ArggghhhhhhHHHHHH-"

"-we should go to the market! They have those, right? On Saturdays? It'll cheer you up!"

Adrien was trying not to vibrate with with excitement. His Dad, ever the strict parent, hardly let him out of the house: if it wasn't for modelling or school, Adrien stayed inside, so he'd never seen a Saturday Market, let alone been to one. He'd seen the things Alya and Marinette picked up from the markets at school, his favourite being a scarlet and black bracelet he’d seen Marinette wearing, and he was beyond desperate to visit one and get some souvenirs for himself. He knew he was being kind of selfish, but it was an opportunity he didn't want to miss and, anyway, he was sure Nino would enjoy it too. Besides, he was sure it would be more fun for both of them to go with a friend anyway.

Nino frowned, "I dunno, man, I really want to just go home and binge on spaghetti shapes and soda." He shrugged, “I don’t really feel like staying out much longer either, I’m tired dude.”

Adrien's face fell. He tried not to look upset, summoning his years of model acting talent, but he wasn't doing very well. "Uh, sure, OK, I'll... um... see you later then?"

Nino rubbed the back of his neck, guilt making him sweaty. He looked at Adrien's poorly disguised disappointment and felt _horrible_. If he didn't take the boy shopping he'd never forgive himself, not to mention the fact that Marinette and Alya wouldn't forgive him either. He couldn't live with that. In fact he wouldn't live-- the Césaire/Dupain-Cheng combo would kill him dead.

He coughed, "Actually, on second thought, the market sounds good. I could grab food there and I need to get my mum a present for her birthday anyway. Plus, the fresh air will probably energise me, right? Win-win."

Adrien's smile could've given the sun a run for its money. "Are you serious?" He smiled even wider when Nino nodded, "OK, OK, let's go! Oh, remind me I need to stock up on cheese, do they have cheese at the market?"

"Er, yeah, sure, but dude like what is your obsession with cheese? For a model with such such a strict diet as you- I mean, come on, you only get like one cookie a year or something - I would've thought cheese would be off the menu."

"Nino, my cheese habits are my own personal business."

Adrien ignored the snicker that inevitably came from his pocket. 

...

The market was beautiful, or at least it was to the young Agreste. 

Every stall seemed to have its own vibrant personality: different matching and clashing colours were dotted all around, spices and fragrances danced around in the air and every stall owner seemed full of their own sort of happiness that they spread to each customer. Some stands were stuffed so full with merchandise that they looked fit to burst at any moment, others were so meticulously organised that Adrien almost felt compelled to check that Nathalie wasn't around. There were people everywhere, chatting and joking amongst themselves, children running in between stalls, squealing with laughter and there were countless different kinds of music blaring at each other, as if in friendly competition. Stalls were selling things from clothing to furniture, jewellery to toys and Ladybug action figures to Chat Noir clocks, which was both disturbing and hilarious to the cat himself. 

It was a boisterous new world and Adrien was loving it. 

Nino raised an eyebrow behind him, a smile beginning to appear on his face. "So, where do you wanna go first man? Can't forget that cheese."

Adrien could see the cheese stall from where he was standing, and it looked like it could collapse at any minute.

Cheese was piled upon cheese, which was then piled upon more cheese, so that there were towers in front, on and behind the stall creating a strange sort of dairy barricade. On the desk of the makeshift shop itself, various different types of cheese were strewn across it: Brie, Cheddar, Wensleydale, Blue, Gouda, even Gorgonzola, but most importantly, there was Camembert. 

Apparently it was popular cheese around the area, because the Camembert pile was significantly larger than the rest, making it even more precarious than the rest of the cheese constructs. The cheese itself was mostly packaged, to prevent the particularly creamy cheese from melting in the Parisian sun, but the bare pieces had the tiny black cat in Adrien's pocket buzzing.

Adrien swallowed. He'd rather avoid the cheese-y mess over there entirely, but he had no choice but to go over there at some point or face Plagg's petty wrath. Not to mention, if he had his own stash of cheese in his room, he wouldn't look so suspicious at home, always taking Camembert from the fridge, and besides, he could already feel Plagg in his pocket trying to drag him towards the cheese hell. He took a deep breath and steeled his resolve.

"Umm, no it's OK, I'll leave the cheese for now. Let's look for a scarf for your mum first, then I'll go get some cheese. We can go look around for other stuff after?"

Nino shrugged in response, "Sure, man, I'm cool with whatever."

The boys started walking towards another stall, one covered with beautiful hand-made scarves, neither noticing the small black, vaguely cat-shaped blob escaping from Adrien's jacket and making a beeline for the cheese stall. 

The small blob cackled to itself. 

...

Plagg shot towards the stall, like a cat on a mission. He was going to eat all that Camembert, every single piece, that'd show Adrien. Adrien couldn't stop him, Adrien didn't even know that he'd left. 

Adrien was powerless.  
Plagg was unstoppable. 

Slowly, so as not to draw attention, Plagg hovered up the side of the cheese stack, keeping an eye on the stall vendor: a plump, happy looking man who was currently serving a customer. 

After looking around, he spotted the perfect place: a small gap between two of the towers (one being the Camembert, obviously) that would hide him, but give him a good view of the street so he could spy on the people going by. 

He might as well have some entertainment whilst eating. 

Plagg settled delicately into the crevice, peeling back the foil casing and began to pull chunks out of the gourd, humming happily at the heavenly taste. It didn't matter that he could technically eat anything rotting to effectively replenish his power, Camembert was the best and it always would be, there was no competition.

Absentmindedly, he turned towards the road to see if there was anything interesting going on. At first glance, all he could see was a couple of alleyways and the pavement, but then he heard something familiar. His senses perked. He saw a flash of red dash from one alley to the next. 

Plagg blinked and shook his head; that couldn't be right, there was no way that that was- 

Another flash of red. 

Plagg nearly spat out his cheese. That was impossible. She couldn't be here. He looked closer, trying to focus on the alley. A red spotted head poked out nervously from behind a dustbin. 

Plagg barely restrained his gasp, accidentally spraying cheese everywhere. 

"Tikki?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the plot thickens 
> 
> this is shorter than I wanted it to be so ill try to make the next one longer :)


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Plagg vs. Tikki throwdown, winner takes all

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> well this took longer than I thought it would 
> 
> I've been catching up with school work so the only time I've had to write is on the bus unfortunately so again, its a little short and i'll try to make it longer next time ahhhh

It was almost funny. Tikki, little miss perfect, had lost her chosen Ladybug... again.

No, actually, it was hilarious, Plagg decided. It was the funniest thing to happen since Nooroo got their head stuck in scabbard back in 1479. There was no way he could let her live this down. 

Quickly, Plagg scooped up some cheese pieces for the road and climbed out of the cheese mountain as carefully as he could, trying not to be seen. He floated under the table and, when he was sure no one was looking, flew towards the alley, laughing to himself the whole time. He flitted about the bins, looking for his sister under the discarded rubbish. 

"Tikki! Hey, Tikki where are you, I know you're here, Spots, I saw your massive head from a mile away."

Plagg kicked a bin lid. There was a tiny 'ow' from underneath. He flew closer, popping another cheese piece in his mouth. "Spots, come on, it's me! Get out from under there." 

A red head peered up at the grinning cat from under the bin lid, eyes wide. Her mouth dropped open. "Plagg?!"

"The one and only! What are you-"

He was suddenly knocked back by Tikki flying at him for a hug, causing the the two of them to go spinning madly through the air. By some miracle, he didn't drop any Camembert, though it was significantly more squished now that he'd been attacked by his crazy sister. Seemingly ignoring Plagg's shocked sputtering, Tikki sniffled into his shoulder. Plagg instantly stiffened. "H-Hey, Spots, don't cry, I... I don't know what to do when you... Tikki, come on."

The red kwami hovered back a bit and wiped her eyes. She tried to smile, but her lip wobbled. "Sorry Plagg," She sniffed, "I'm just a little emotional. I can't find my chosen and then I got lost and now you're _here_ and I... I don't know what to do, what if there's an attack? What... what if she's already hurt?" She sniffled again, looking on the verge of a full on melt down.

Frowning, Plagg handed her a piece of cheese to make her feel better. She smiled weakly, but didn't make any action to eat it. The two of them silently flew deeper into the alley so that they wouldn't be seen, though Plagg's eyes still glowed green in the darkness. They sat in silence for a while, the only sound being the occasional tiny sob. As they did every time they met, they spent a moment glad that there was always someone who understood. No matter what situation they ended up in, or which holder they had, or even what year it was, they knew that they still had each other, no matter what. Both Kwami inwardly hoped they could stay like this forever, peaceful and without outside constraint, but inevitably Plagg broke the silence. "So, how did you lose your Ladybug this time?" He tried for a reassuring smile, but it came out as more of a grimace.

Tikki smiled a little and recounted the story to Plagg, though she left out details like Marinette's identity, just in case. Her counterpart, for once, listened intently, occasionally making a comment or inhaling some more Camembert. 

"So then, what?"

"Well, after a little thinking, I thought it would be a good idea to follow that Alya girl home. I think she wants to be a reporter, so she often runs towards Akuma victims, so if there was any attacks today, my Ladybug might be there too. But, instead she came here and I lost her in the crowd." Tikki sighed, "My chosen is probably worried about me. I don't doubt she's looking for me, but I need to find her as soon as possible."

Sliding the last cheese piece into his mouth, Tikki having handed it back to him quietly when she saw him running low, Plagg considered this. He wanted to help Tikki, she was his sister and therefore very important, however he knew the rules: only the chosen Chat Noir and Ladybug should reveal themselves to one another (something, something, balance), he mustn't be seen by anyone who wasn't a miraculous holder and he must remain loyal to his holder. The last one always seemed stupid to him, being the embodiment of destruction kinda gave way to a lot of evil holders, so Plagg chose to ignore it, unless he had a chosen he dubbed 'worthy'. His traitorous brain instantly thought 'like Adrien', so he chose to ignore that too. Obviously there was only one option if he wanted Tikki to stop crying. 

He put a tiny paw on her shoulder. "Come with me then, you can meet my Chat Noir and he can get you back to your Ladybug, problem solved!"

Tikki gasped, "Plagg, you know the rules, no one can know! Not even us! Not until they've told each other... if they tell each other."

"That didn't stop you in 101BC."

"That was different, they already knew, they were just too shy to admit it."

"I remember it differently, I'm certain someone was using their good luck powers so that-"

Tikki put both her paws on Plagg's mouth, trying to get him to be quiet. "Shush, now is not the time to debate over the past, right now I need to find Mari- um, my Ladybug."

Plagg wriggled out of her grip. "Sure, then my Chat Noir can help you. Let's go. He’s in the market somewhere looking at presents or something."

Taking Tikki's paw, he started to pull her out of the alley. Tikki had other ideas; she pulled against Plagg and shot past him, sticking her tongue out. "No! I'm not meeting your chosen, I need to find mine!"

"Spots, I thought this was important? I don't want to play chase!" Plagg said, though he couldn’t help smiling like a cat that got the cheese. Tikki gave him a disappointed look, always so motherly. She spun around and zoomed through the air, twisting and turning around table legs and people, with the grace of a dancer. 

Plagg, on the other hand, lived up to his name. While Tikki floating past brought luck, Plagg only brought disaster: a man fell over nothing, multiple stalls collapsed and, according to witness accounts, a cake exploded. Ironically enough, this was the icing on the cake, setting off the rest of the mayhem. 

...

Adrien's head shot up at the scream. An Akuma? He put down the Ultimate Mecha Strike Original cartridge and murmured a half-baked excuse to Nino. Before the DJ could ask about why he was going to look for a new umbrella so suddenly, Adrien had run into the nearest alley. He pulled open his jacket. 

"Plagg, Claws Out!"

He waited for the familiar wash of magic to fall over him as he punched and finessed his way through his magical girl dance routine, jumping out of the alley with a yell as he punched the sky as Chat N... wait a second. 

Chat Noir had not miraculously appeared. Instead, Adrien Agreste had just leapt, screaming, from his second alley today. 

People, naturally, were staring. Adrien felt his face heat up. He heard a camera shutter. With an awkward wave, he darted back into the crowds to panic.

Plagg had to be near, he couldn't have gone too far because he was definitely in the pocket when they arrived at the market, but he was still far enough away that the transformation didn't automatically pull him in. Adrien tried not to groan; this wasn't the first time Plagg wasn't where he should be.

The situation was getting worse, people were still yelling across the fair (did someone say cake?) and there were crashes and bangs coming from all sides, so Adrien chose the smart option and grabbed a scarf, vowing to pay for it later and running towards the danger. With any luck, he could find Plagg on the way. He wrapped the chiffon around his face as he ran, hoping it would conceal his identity enough. 

There was another scream. Adrien took a sharp right. What was happening? This side of the fair was in shambles: tables were in pieces, merchandise was everywhere and multiple people were crying or taking advantage of the runaway confectionary. Strangely, the only stall still intact was the cheese one. Adrien's heart sank.

"Hey, Adrien!" Plagg's voice called from somewhere to Adrien's left.

Beside him, a stationary shop's front legs broke, spilling pencils, sharpeners and rubbers galore onto the concrete. With a exasperated sigh, Adrien turned to face his Kwami. 

Of course, there was Plagg, floating next to the stall, desperately struggling with a... red version of himself? He was almost certain, like 75% sure, that Kwami didn't have evil twins, or twins at all. Even if they did, Plagg would be the evil one, being the little cheese guzzling menace that he was. The other Kwami was a bright, almost glowing, pretty crimson colour, with a black spot on her head and little antennae. Before he could think too much about what this meant, Plagg growled, "A little help?"

He was still holding on desperately to the other Kwami's tails (or were they feathers?) as the two battled for an advantage over the other. The other Kwami was making frustrated squeaking noises as they tried to get away, though Adrien had to wonder why their little hands were over their eyes. Suddenly aware that his Kwami was out in the open, Adrien broke up the cat-fight by quickly scooping the two of them up and shoving them in his pocket, just in time for Nino and, mysteriously, Alya to come jogging round the corner. 

Alya whistled, making a 'hooo-wee' sound, "Yikes, what happened here? There wasn't an Akuma was there? Nice scarf, by the way. Green really is your colour, you know."

Adrien shrugged, brain still not quite processing what had happened. The two Kwami were still wriggling in his inside pocket, so he crossed his arms to stop himself from laughing. Who knew he was ticklish? "I didn't see an Akuma, so I don't think this was the work of Hawk Moth, probably just a prank or something. Anyway, when did you get here?" Adrien asked, summoning all his modelling talent to try to look natural, "Mari told me you had a journalism class?"

The Kwami stopped struggling. Plagg audibly sighed in relief from the pocket. The other Kwami hit him. 

Adrien tried not to laugh, hugging his chest to try to constrict their movement. Alya looked up from her phone, having been taking some shameless pictures of the destroyed fair. She gave Adrien a strange look but said, "You spoke to Mari?" 

Adrien nodded and Alya grinned mischievously. Before Adrien could wonder what that meant, Alya carried on talking, "Oh, I had to get a gift for my mum, her birthday's coming up and she's really hard to buy for. Figured I'd go whilst she was at work."

"Oh, same." Nino shouted from behind them, having stopped to help the stationary stall owner fix his table. 

"Oh sweet! I still don't know what to get her though. Speaking of Mari however, I've got a bit of a mystery. I found her bag sopping wet on the bridge and I can't call her, her phone's in her bag, but have either of you seen her since this morning?" 

Alya was fiddling with her satchel, eventually pulling out a plastic bag with Marinette's signature purse inside. Adrien frowned, taking the soaked purse out of the carrier bag and opening it. Sure enough, Marinette's name was sewn neatly inside. 

Handing it back to Alya, he said, "When I saw her this morning, she was by the top end of La Seine and she was leaning over the wall trying to grab something, maybe she dropped her bag?"

Alya pointed her finger and smirked, "Ah, but then how did it get on the bridge? It couldn't have just flown up there by itself! Something else must have happened, but what- do you think it could have been an Akuma?"

Adrien shrugged, "Why would an Akuma be helpful? They don't usually do any good, though I guess there have been some exceptions... Maybe-" Adrien cut off as he felt his phone vibrate in his other pocket. He pulled it out. The new message read:

**(12:37) From Nathalie (The Terrible)**

**_Adrien Agreste if you do not arrive home in the next 10 minutes exactly, I will be revoking your free time privileges._ **

 

Adrien paled. Nathalie had used this threat before and she was serious every single time; if he was even one second later than the time allowed, he'd have an hour taken off the time left aside for socialising with his friends. His phone pinged as another text came through:

 

**(12:38) From Nathalie (The Terrible)**

**_If you take more than 15 minutes to arrive, I will not hesitate to tell your father that you escaped._ **

 

Oh god, now he really was in trouble. 

"Uhhh, guys I have to go, Nathalie needs me home for something, sorry!"

Adrien didn't wait to hear his friends' replies, he just threw the scarf at Nino and ran as fast as his legs could take him round the corner, cursing his bad luck. There was no way he could get from the fair to the house on foot in time, he'd have to resort to his cat-like cunning. Luckily, there was no one in the street over, the commotion at the fair had likely drawn people's attention, but Adrien leant against the wall out of sight, just in case.  
   
Plagg hovered out of his coat, little arms crossed and a scowl on his face.   
"What took you so long kid? I'm running low on cheese already!"

"I'll get you cheese later, right now I need to get home fast."

"Fine, but first I need to tell you-"

"Plagg, not now! I need to-" He raised his hand, curling it into a fist.

"No, kid, don't you dare. You'll hurt Tikki if you transform!"

Adrien blinked. "Who?"

In his haste to get home, he'd completely forgotten about the other Kwami in his coat. He heard a high pitched mumble that sounded like 'please don't transform' come softly from his pocket. Plagg rolled his eyes and flew closer to the coat. 

"Spots, get out of there, he'll have to see you eventually."

"No! What about the rules? I can't break the rules, I'm not you!" was the distressed, muffled and very squeaky reply. 

"But Spots, you're not breaking them! Come on, you're not revealing anyone's identity, _you're_ the one meeting him, he's definitely a Miraculous holder and you've done nothing but be loyal to your dumb Bug, so let's go! You've got to come out of there eventually."

"But, Plagg, if I come out of here, I'll know who he is! I can't lie to my chosen like that, what if he's someone she knows as a civilian? There's too many thing that could go wrong! It's reckless and, quite frankly, dishonest!" came the high pitched reply. 

Adrien decided that today was one of the weirdest days of his life and he'd probably aged 20 years because of it. So much for his boyish good looks; good bye modelling career, it was horrible knowing you. He felt the Kwami in his pocket wiggle awkwardly, "And she's not dumb Plagg, she's really very smart. I just don't want this backfiring on me, or her... or you for that matter."

Plagg wiggled his way back into the pocket, tugging gently at Tikki's tiny arm with a Cheshire grin. "Guess we'll need some luck, then, won't we Spots?"

It was about as considerate as Plagg got. Tikki sighed, knowing resistance was futile, but still a part of her rebelled as the chances of this situation doing more harm than good was ridiculously high, especially if she was going to ask Chat Noir to help her find Marinette. She silently hoped that Marinette and Chat didn't know each other, that he was a complete stranger so the complications could be kept to a minimum, but alas, Plagg had greater influence over his wielder, so when Tikki silently flew out of the pocket, paws over her eyes, she had no idea what she was about to see a great big blonde problem. 

Plagg quietly pulled her hands away and Tikki sighed, opening her eyes slowly as she said, "Hello, I'm Tikki, Ladybu- oh my stars!"

Tikki was looking directly into the eyes of the very famous, very handsome, Adrien Agreste, the subject of Marinette's massive, uncontrollable, and unforgettable crush. 

So much for limited complications. 


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Halloween children its time for Angst

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> eyyyyyyyyyy the chapter is finally long-ish hoorah
> 
> and yes, I did deliberately leave uploading this to Halloween to be dramatic

This was not happening. 

Tikki could feel herself falling through the air but she couldn't find the energy to force herself to float back up, she was too busy thinking about the terrible mistake she'd made. Adrien Agreste? How could she keep that from Mari, she could be so happy, they could be together-

This was **not** happening. 

If Marinette ever found out she'd been keeping this from her, any trust she'd built with her charge would be shattered. Why did it have to be Adrien Agreste, of all the people in Paris? Why couldn't it be some random stranger who lived in the shadows, like some kind of weird Parisian hermit? Even just an everyday stranger would have been better that Adrien ‘Paris’ Sweetheart’ Agreste.

It was just Plagg's luck, and though Tikki usually balanced him out, she had an inkling that Fu had chosen the rich kitten in the mansion-shaped cage for a reason. He always was a match-maker at heart, though likely his reasons ran down multiple routes, but Tikki choose not to delve too deep. 

That inner monologue was for another day. 

Though Chat Noir being Adrien Agreste made her situation so, so much worse, it couldn't be helped, or at least that was what Tikki was telling herself. She'd kept worse from her chosen in the past and her lips were sealed. It wasn't lying if you didn't say anything, right?

Right?

Maybe she wouldn't have to worry about it, seeing as **_this was not happening._**

...

Adrien and Plagg were watching Tikki with morbid fascination as she bobbed awkwardly in the air. Her expression was blank, her blue eyes wide, as if she was frightened. She almost looked as if she were a puppet hung from a single string, being bounced up and down in an off-beat dance by an inexperienced puppeteer. 

"Is she alright?" Adrien asked Plagg, who shrugged in response. 

"Eh, it's happened before.” He murmured. “Just give her a minute to process the information. Hey, at least you're not the heir to a throne, that was a break down I'll never forget."

"What?"

"Doesn't matter, point is, Tikki will be fine. Drama just... gets to her."

Adrien was sceptical, but he let the matter rest. Plagg obviously knew more than he was letting on, but Adrien trusted him to make the right decision. He glanced at Tikki for a moment and felt sorry for her, wanting to help but not knowing how. Obviously something about him had seriously shocked her, seeing as she was twitching like she'd been electrocuted. He wasn't vain enough to think she was a fan (why would a Kwami care about a human model?) but, she quite clearly knew his face, so she must have seen him before somewhere, maybe she had a holder who knew about him? But the only other miraculous holders in Paris were... 

Plagg's cough brought him out of his thoughts and he suddenly remembered there was another problem at hand. "So, how do I get home in time without transforming? We've wasted three minutes as it is."

"That's easy. You can still transform, just do it a distance away so you don't drag her into my ring, stupid."

Plagg gently dragged the twitching Tikki to the wall before he flew past Adrien to the other side of the street, waiting impatiently. Shrugging, Adrien followed.

 

"Claws Out!"

This time, Chat Noir leapt successfully from an alley, leather clad and ready to run.

 _"OK, kid."_ Plagg's voice said in his head, _"Grab Tikki, stick her in your pocket and lets go."_

...

Cat Noir wasn't seen by anyone as he slipped past the security cameras around the Agreste Mansion. 

Not a soul witnessed the superhero in question land a street away and turn magically into the Agreste heir, nor did they see him holding two strange-looking faeries in his hands and or notice him tuck them carefully in his pockets. 

No one saw him click the buzzer and walk silently through the gate, head hung like criminal and fists clenched nervously at his sides. 

Someone did, however, witness the scolding that the boy received when he entered the house, two minutes early, from his father's assistant Nathalie, and this witness was known as the Gorilla. 

 

Of course his real name wasn't the Gorilla, but many had called him as such in the past, and he'd never bothered to correct them, so eventually, the nickname stuck. Who knew if anyone other than himself knew what his real name was. He'd seen many things in his life as, though he was imposing, his quiet deposition meant that he blended well into the background noise of wherever his employer needed to go. This was a useful talent as a bodyguard, as people tended to forget that he was there and it was easier to prevent an escalated situation. There was a reason he was the best of the best. 

But, in this case there was nothing he could do. He watched as Nathalie calmly tore into Adrien like a vulture at a carcass. Her clipped tone was the only indicator that she was actually angry, as her face remained mostly neutral. The Gorilla almost wished he could help, but unfortunately there was no way to avoid the inevitable. He'd kept quiet as long as he could when Adrien had not-so-subtly snuck away, as he knew that the young Agreste only wanted some rarely given freedom. However, he'd no choice but to give the game up when Nathalie sent her per-hour-check-up text; his momma raised an honest boy and he wasn't about to change his morals. 

Even so, he silently vowed to bring the boy something sweet later on to cheer him up, because right now Adrien looked as if the world was ending: his face was completely void of emotion, his gaze empty. Guilt was not a foreign feeling in his line of work, but he felt like he'd really done wrong this time. The more scoldings Adrien received, the more blank his expression became and, not for the first time, he worried for the boy's mental health. Adrien just shut off nowadays and it was frightening. 

Nathalie finished her lecture and sent Adrien to his room, the two adults silently watching him go. The Gorilla turned to Nathalie and quietly asked her why she was so harsh, being careful to use just the right phrasing so as not to offend her, a talent gained from years of co-working. He looked at her earnestly and she sighed, "It's this, or I tell his father." She looked up at him, face expertly impassive, "Gabriel won't show any mercy, not even to his own child, you know that. It'll only make it worse."

The Gorilla nodded, completely understanding. If Adrien kept pulling stunts like this, eventually his father would find out, no matter how strict the measures they put in place to stop it were. It was a matter of reducing the number of escape attempts as well as the amount of successful escapes, something he would have to think about, seeing as he was guardian over Adrien most of the time. 

Nodding to Nathalie, the Gorilla slowly started to meander into the kitchen to look for some sweets, glad that the chef wasn't due to come in until five; the chef was vividly passionate about his craft and was unnecessarily rude to everyone but Gabriel. When the Gorilla couldn't find any sugary things, though it was probably to be expected, Adrien's diet included the minimum amount of sugar possible, he decided to go a step further. 

He grabbed an apron. He was going to bake the best homemade cookies that that kid had ever had. 

...

Meanwhile, Adrien was pacing in his room, two tiny Gods following him tentatively. He spun around and nearly knocked the Kwami out of the air, making them jump. "OK, so let me get this straight. You, Tikki, er- I mean Spots, sorry what is your name-"

Tikki smiled gently, still twitching a little, "My name is Tikki! I’m pleased to meet you!" She carefully ignored Plagg’s amused snort from behind her.

"Tikki, OK, cool, that's cool, Tikki. So, er, Tikki, what you're telling me is that you're... you are in fact..." Adrien took a deep breath, "L-Ladybug's Kwami?"

Tikki swallowed, suddenly nervous. Was this a mistake? Was it too late to back out now and not do this? Could she fly fast enough to reach the window before Plagg could catch her? Definitely not, he was faster when full of food... somehow. 

Adrien was waiting for an answer. He had an expectant, hopeful looking expression on his face, like she held the most wonderful gift he could ever imagine in her paws, and in a way she did. She had the answers to all his questions. It was which questions was she chose to answer that she had to be careful with. There were many things she could say to him, but most were not her secrets to reveal. She didn't want to jeopardise any relationship that Adrien and Marinette could have in the future either, so this was going to be difficult. Taking a moment to decide, Tikki took a deep breath and jumped headfirst into uncertainty. 

"Yes." She looked up, expression and tone unreadable, "I'm Ladybug's Kwami. It's nice to meet you, Chat Noir."

"Oh my gosh." Adrien gasped, both hands clutching his head, and fell backwards onto his bed, grinning, and Tikki struggled to hold back a smile. He really was in love with Ladybug, wasn't he?

"No way. Ladybug's- No wa- wait so you know who my Lady is? Can you tell me?"

Tikki instantly tensed. Her expression became almost aggressive, and it was a look that was so out of place on her face that Plagg choose this moment to cut in, flying around her to glare at Adrien with a frown, an expression practically etched onto his face. 

"Kid, she's not going to tell you. It's against the rules." He said, still scowling. 

Adrien blinked and sat up, unable to hide the disappointment in his tone, "But I wouldn't- I’m not trying to break the-I’m just curious, I’m so sorry I shouldn’t have-“

Flying closer to Adrien face, Plagg shook his head and crossed his arms. "Nah. I'm talking about the Kwami rules, she's not gunna tell you who the Bug is, because the rules 'are our foundation' or something; thought I'd mentioned them before." He shrugged, "Guess not."

Adrien frowned, not sure whether to be concerned or not, "What Kwami rules? They sound important, why didn't you say anything about them before?"

Plagg shrugged again and picked at his teeth, "Couldn't care less about them, Tikki's the expert. She's a real fanatic."

He flicked Tikki with his tail, which broke her out of her guarded focus. She pouted and kicked Plagg, hard, between his shoulder blades.

Ignoring his pained shout, she coughed politely and caught him in a disapproving glare. Plagg floated over to the sock drawer to sulk, muttering something about 'secret cheese' and 'comfort eating'. Adrien made a quick mental note not to cross Tikki, it seemed that she was as feisty as Ladybug herself. He also made a mental note to clean out his sock drawer; if there really was secret cheese in there, it had probably been in there a while.

His attention was brought back to Tikki as she cleared her throat; she spoke methodically, as if she was reciting a speech for the millionth time, "The rules of Kwami are something we came up with years and years ago to keep us and our charges safe. They've changed a little here and there over time, but they're pretty simple." She held up a paw, "Number one: to keep the balance between good and bad luck, only the chosen Chat Noir and Ladybug should reveal themselves to one another, so until my Ladybug is ready to show herself to you, if she ever is, you shouldn't know who she is. This rule has tweaked here and there in the past depending on the circumstance, but in this case you should take it as it is. If you figure out her identity that's a different matter, but I doubt you will, there's ancient magic that twists perception attached to my Miraculous that should prevent that. It's only ever happened a couple of times in the past, and I'm pretty sure they were guesses... or _someone_ broke a rule."

"That's not true! You're just mad your Bugs didn't figure it out first, you're jealous of my Cats!" Plagg yelled from the drawer, voice muffled as he buried himself in socks. 

Tikki rolled her eyes, "Anyway, where was I? Right, number two: we mustn't be seen by anyone who isn't a miraculous holder, and I will admit... I've broken this one in the past and I'm not proud of it, though to be fair, the most recent time they thought I was a plastic toy."

She choose to ignore Plagg's cackling from the drawer behind her and continued her explanation. 

"Finally, we must remain loyal to our holders. This is Plagg's favourite one to break." 

"Hey!" came the indignant squawk from within the socks, "S'not my fault they suck sometimes, it's not like I can do anything about stupid humans."

"What do you mean?" Adrien looked nervous, "Betrayal?"

Tikki's expression softened and she heard Plagg stop rustling behind her, his head popping up suddenly, socks flying everywhere. It wasn't that Adrien wasn't a smart person, in fact he was very intelligent, it was just that he'd never considered that Plagg would ever give him reason to question the mutual trust between them. The thought of that trust breaking was horrifying, to say the least. 

"Kid, I'm made of destruction energy." Plagg said with a scowl, as if that explained everything. 

Seeing as it did not, as Adrien looked at Tikki for help, only panicking slightly. Tikki sighed, her voice heavy with memories and sadness. She flew over to the drawer and perched herself on some socks next to Plagg's head. She slowly folded some next to her to occupy her hands, needing to do something. She avoided looking at either of them, and with a start Adrien realised she looked older somehow, like she'd seen a thousand horrors and had resigned herself to her fate. The spark of joy that was always present in her eyes had dimmed.

She spoke quietly, her voice almost a whisper, "Can you guess how many people have tried to use our powers- have tried to use _us_ for evil?" She didn't wait for Adrien's answer. "Too many, more than I can count. It's... difficult being a Kwami. I won't ask you to try to understand because, and please don't take this the wrong way, you can't. We have long and... sad pasts Adrien and, unfortunately, they haven't all been cookies and cheese."

Plagg nodded solemnly, which was strange considering he was still submerged in socks from the neck down. He was somber for a moment, concentrating on picking the right words. Eventually, he said, "I can't stand idiots, so I try not to waste my time on them."

He looked his charge in the eye, the most serious that Adrien had ever seen him. 

"And you're no idiot, Adrien Agreste."

 

The conversation was interrupted suddenly by a knock on the door, making everyone jump. Immediately, Tikki and Plagg shot under the chest of drawers, squished but hidden. Adrien scrambled to get up from the bed and tripped on the duvet covers, so he half-hopped, half-dragged himself to the door. He yanked it open as soon as he reached it, but there was no one there. Instead, there was a plate of warm cookies on the floor, complete with a glass of milk and a note that read:

_"Cookies and cream,_  
_An apology treat,_  
_Just like a dream,_  
_A favour complete"_

Adrien smiled, knowing exactly who the sugary treats were from: there was only one person in the house who had enough time to make him fresh cookies, the same person who, strangely enough, had a secret love of rhyme-based poetry. Though the cookies themselves were not much to look at, they were lopsided and uneven, maybe a little overcooked, they were made with kindness and good intentions and Adrien accepted them gratefully. He walked back into his room, placing the plate and glass on the computer desk as he walked past. 

"It's OK, there's no one out here."

Plagg and Tikki flew out from under the chest of drawers and both immediately soared toward their favourite food: Plagg shoving his head back into the socks to dig for his Camembert, Tikki zipping over to the cookie plate to drool. She looked at Adrien hopefully. 

"You want one?" He said, not even trying to hide his grin. 

Tikki nodded and Adrien handed her one, sitting down at his computer desk. In between bites, she answered some more of Adrien's questions, always taking time to choose her words carefully. Whether Adrien noticed or not, he didn't say, but he did try to ask questions that weren't invasive, knowing now that Tikki had sworn to protect his Lady's secrets. It was a comfortable conversation, though not exciting, as neither of them were used to each other's company, but both were happy to talk to someone new and wanted to make a good impression. 

Adrien took a sip of his milk and wiped away the frothy moustache. He said, "So... you eat cookies?"

"Yep! Technically, I can eat anything, but sugary or natural things, like freshly-baked pastries or home-picked fruits, give me back the most strength, but I prefer cookies over most other things." Tikki waved the remains of the cookie to demonstrate, "I've found they give me the most energy too."

"That pretty cool, actually. What about Plagg?"

Grinning, Tikki whispered, "He doesn't like to say but, he can _technically_ eat anything rotting for the most effective boost, be it mouldy bread, certain mushrooms, anything fermented, even food off cuts! He doesn't tell his holders because he just wants to eat Camembert all day, he doesn't really like much else; he believes in a cheese or nothing philosophy. He won't mind if you know though, he likes you."

Adrien's mouth fell open. Tikki took another bite of her cookie and tried not to giggle. It was always a little funny when Plagg's chosen discovered his cheesy deceit (Adrien's shocked expression was _priceless_ ), though none of them took it to heart, knowing that if they had the choice, they'd eat their favourite food forever too.

Besides, everyone has their secrets. 

She looked down at the cookie in her hand and was suddenly hit with a craving for Marinette's infamous Chocolate Chip Triple Deluxe cookies as a bizarre type of homesickness suddenly swept over her. She pulled a face at the misshapen cookie in her paws, it's deliciousness disappointing in comparison. 

"What's the matter, does it not taste right?" Adrien picked up a cookie to try, "Hmm, they're not the worst, I like them, but then again I'm no expert. I don't get to eat sweets that often."

Tikki's antennae shot up straight. A plan was starting to formulate in her head, but it was risky and there was a lot that could go wrong, though it could work out if she played her cards right. She wasn't sure she liked her idea, but it was all she had. The problem was that for it to work, she'd have to lie, and Tikki was horrible at lying. 

"Well... as a cookie expert... I'd have to say the best cookies I've ever tasted came fresh from the Dupain-Cheng Bakery, round the corner from h-here I think?" She winced; she was already stumbling over her words. 

Adrien raised his eyebrows, surprised, "Oh! That's my friend Marinette's bakery, she goes to my school, she's really nice."

Tikki couldn't meet his eyes as she stuttered, "O-Oh, really? Well, d-do you think you could take me down there one day? T-They make their cookies f-fresh every morning!" The substitute cookie felt heavy in her hands. She took another bite, the burnt chocolate crumbs tasting like dirt. 

Adrien frowned, "I'd love to, but I'd have to be sneaky, they'll be keeping a close eye on me what with today's... er... noble escape?"

This was going to be harder than she thought. She realised that he was right of course, the Gorilla and Nathalie would absolutely double their efforts to keep him safe if he kept trying to escape. But, if she could get to the bakery, she could get to Marinette, and she _had_ to get back to Marinette. 

"Are you sure? Is there no way y-you could get there as Chat Noir? I d-don't mean to be rude."

Adrien waved his hands about, "No, no no, you're not! You're not being rude! I... I can try? It might not be straight away though, sorry."

It would have to do. She couldn't in good conscience push him to do something that could land him in trouble, not to mention how it could affect his double life as Chat, so waiting seemed like the only available option. Lying to someone directly wasn't exactly her forte either as, much like Marinette, she was just too expressive to have an effective poker face and she stuttered terribly when nervous. Hopefully Marinette, and by extension Paris, could last without her for a couple of days, though knowing her charge it was likely that she was still frantically panicking. 

Best case scenario, Adrien could take her to the bakery tomorrow or she could sneak back to Marinette at school on Monday. Worse case scenario, she didn't make it to Mari in time and Hawk Moth inevitably won, and that was not an option she was willing to let happen. 

...

While Tikki and Adrien had been talking, Plagg had finally finished the last of his slightly gone-off secret cheese. He choose not to listen to their conversation, thinking it was just going to be stuff he'd already heard a million times, and he wasn't wrong. After floating aimlessly around the room for a while, he meandered over to Tikki, bored. She hadn't noticed him, as she was busy explaining how Lucky Charm worked, so he decided to play a little prank on her. 

He snuck up behind her silently, ignoring Adrien's warning glare and suddenly leapt at her with a victory cry. 

"Adrien? What's the-" Tikki screeched as Plagg pulled hard on her antenna, trying desperately to reach him behind her, but her little arms were too short. He let go, in between laughing, shooting upwards out of her reach as she rolled across the desk, landing with a 'thunk' against the monitor. 

As she sat up, blowing a bruised antennae out of her eye, she hissed, "Plagg! I'm going to get you for that, oh my **_stars_** , are you in for it now!"

The two of them flew faster than the eye could follow around the room, zipping from side to side, trying to avoid and catch one another in a frenzied game of tag. They were like red and black fireflies dancing around the room, beautiful but strange. They slowed down for second as Plagg lost track of his sister. He was looking around for her when, out of nowhere, Tikki flew out from behind a curtain and kicked Plagg in the tummy so hard that he shot across the room like lightning. For a second Adrien thought he was going to crash into the door and ran to catch him, but Plagg phased through seamlessly with a grin on his face. With a light hearted giggle, Tikki rocketed after him, shooting through the door just as easily. 

Adrien stood there, shell shocked for a second, thinking 'boy, that escalated quickly'. They really were like little kids, terrorising each other in a game of sibling rivalry. Adrien sat down and went to eat one of the remaining cookies left on the plate when suddenly he paled, having had an epiphany: the Kwami were now loose in his house.

_The Kwami were now loose in his house._

**_The Kwami were now loose in. his. house._ **

Oh no.   
He had a bad feeling about this. 

...

The two Kwami had completely forgotten about Adrien, too wrapped up in their game to notice he was missing. They hadn't seen each other in decades and family gatherings were always hectic, so minor things like Adrien Agreste just didn't seem to matter. 

It was just Tikki and Plagg, playing a game like they always did. Potted plants were hid behind, corridors used as race tracks and ceilings were dubbed as the designated drop kick area. Walls were bounced off of, floors slid along and corner swung around. It was the most fun they'd had in years, and Plagg was not one to waste the opportunity. 

It was rare he saw his sister on good terms, often he was subject to holders who thought they could just boss him around or bend him to their selfish wants, and, as he hated following orders more than anything, it was hell. His miraculous, like Tikki's, was bound by ancient spells, ones even he could not undo, that meant he couldn't remove his miraculous from a holder, they had to willingly give it up or take it off, so no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't get rid of them and he hated it more than anything. The only other option was to have it stolen by someone else, preferably another miraculous holder, but that hardly ever worked in his favour.

He couldn't even ditch the dumb trinket itself; if he left it too long between transformations or he didn't hibernate, he could fade away. There was no way he'd let that happen either, he'd never leave Tikki alone, no matter how much he may want to sometimes. Plagg could easily imagine how Nooroo was feeling right now, where ever they were, trapped by some malicious human only out for their own desires. It was sickening, so he chose to fight for good whenever he could, and keep Tikki smiling. If there was one thing in this world he cared about above anything else, it was Tikki, not that he'd ever tell her. 

Cheese was obviously a close second, but it was moments like this, where they could just be young again and goof off like they'd never seen the darkest, most horrific sides of the world, that meant the most. 

"Tag! You're it, kitty cat!" Tikki laughed as she tapped Plagg's tail, as it poked out from behind a chair leg, "Catch me if you can! Which you can't, because you're too sloooooow!"

"I'm faster than you Spots, and you know it!" He couldn't help but grin when she was having fun, her joy was infectious. Tikki really knew how to light up a room. 

But didn't mean he was going to just let her win. 

Using the table to push off, like a bird, Plagg soared through the air. Time seemed to move in slow motion as he stretched out a paw to touch Tikki's tails and tag her. He was going to win for sure. 

Now, while there were things that Plagg was good at, he had always been exceptional at eating cheese for example, his math skills... they were not so good. 

Having severely miscalculated his trajectory, he slammed into Tikki at such an angle that he propelled her into the next room at a startling speed. He then smacked headfirst into the door frame a second later, sliding down to the floor with a groan. When he looked up, slightly dazed, he saw Tikki batting around the other room like a pachinko ball in play.  

 _'Oops'_ he thought silently. _'That looks like it hurts.'_

When the crashing noises stopped, Plagg rushed into the room after her and looked around frantically. "Spots? You OK? Tikki, answer me!"

There was a squeak from the other side of the room. Tikki was lying in in front of a huge painting of a pretty blonde lady, curled up in a ball. She waved at Plagg weakly as he floated down next to her. 

He said, "Sorry, sorry, are you alright? I didn't mean to do that..."

Tikki pulled herself up, wincing as she checked for damage. The tiny bruises on her arms were already healing. She grinned and said, "It's fine, I'm pretty lucky!"

Plagg couldn't help a tiny smile at the old phrase. They used to say it all the time as a joke, she'd say "I'm pretty lucky!" and Plagg would say "Well what does that make me? Ugly unlucky?" back, like the cheesiest comedy duo routine ever.

It seemed like forever ago. 

"Anyway, where are we? Who's this?" She said, pointing at the massive portrait. 

"Oh, that's Adrien's mum. She's not around anymore, but her picture's full of cool stuff, look!"

He flew up, Tikki wobbling behind him, and went through the painting into the safe behind him, gently dragging Tikki through as well. She took a quick glance around the safe and gasped, "Wow, you were right, there is a lot of- _Dusuu?_ "

Plagg blinked. What? He followed Tikki's eye line and tried not to scream in frustration. How had not noticed that before? Dusuu's miraculous was right there. Right in front of him, plumage bright and very, very obvious. He'd been in here tons of times to hide from Adrien, how had he missed his sister sitting right there? _Right there?_

Well, there was only one thing to do. 

"Oh yeah, her. She's here too."

_Bluff like there was no tomorrow._

Tikki gaped at him, "You didn't even see her did you?"

"I can neither confirm or deny that statement."

"Plagg! I cannot believe y- oh never mind, there's no use crying about it. Might as well see if she's actually in there. Can you help me carry it?"

Plagg shook his head and said, "There's no point, even if she is in there, we can't phase the miraculous through the door and if we try to get the thing out by ourselves, we'll definitely be seen. Come on Spots, use your massive head."

Tikki paused. After a moment she clapped her hands together and gasped, "Adrien! Adrien could get her out of here and then we could take her back to Fu!"

"No! He'll get in trouble again and then what'll he do? You can't ask him to do that, besides he's not ready to meet Fu." Plagg crossed his arms. There was no way he was putting Adrien in the firing line like that. A kid like him, running around with three Kwami and two unsealed miraculous? It'd be like he was asking to be attacked by all things of magic and mayhem. There was only so much protecting Plagg could do. But the look on Tikki's face was wearing down his resolve. Family was really important to her and he knew she wouldn't leave Duusu there on her own. He sighed. 

"OK, compromise. Adrien will fetch the bird brain's badge and hide it somewhere until we find your Ladybug, then _she_ can take her to Fu. Sound good?" 

Tikki considered this for a moment then nodded. "It's settled then."

"Let's get our sister out of here."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pain and suffering my guys, pain and suffering  
> also someone needs to hold an invention for my excessive use of italics

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so I know this is so late but in my defence, my computer has been broken for months so this is the first chance I've gotten to force feed you this trash I'm so sorry  
> the next chapter is almost done too so enjoyyyy

"OK, wait, let me get this straight. After you made a mess throughout my house and accidentally injured each other-"

"Actually, Plagg injured us both-"

"Don't tell him that!"

"-you then broke into my mother's picture, through to my father's safe behind it-"

"I wouldn't say broke in, more like we explored-"

"Plagg, shh!"

"What?"

"-and you now want me, in broad daylight, to break into that safe also, to save your sister?"

Tikki and Plagg looked at each other, then back at Adrien. "Yes... please?" Tikki said nervously. 

Adrien blinked and thought about it for a moment. What would Chat Noir do? He looked up with a excited expression, "OK, lets do it!"

...

The plan went about as well as expected. 

The heist started off fine: they made it to the room with the painting without being seen. The Gorilla was cleaning up the mess he'd made in the kitchen and Nathalie wouldn't move from the computer until 6:45 sharp, so that gave them plenty of time to get there and back without detection.

As soon as they'd all agreed on the plan, they set off. Adrien pushed the giant portrait of his mother to the side slowly, to avoid making noise. When the safe was revealed, Plagg went through it and opened it from the inside. Both Kwami flew in and pointed at Duusu's miraculous, which Adrien picked up and slid into his pocket. 

The mission was a success, though Adrien had to wonder why his dad had all this stuff in his safe, and why he kept his safe hidden behind a picture of Mum; it was suspicious even by his standards. 

Adrien turned to leave, but stopped when he heard Tikki gasp. She was staring at a tiny, almost Kwami-sized book hidden in the corner of the safe. It was dark brown, ornate, with a golden clasp keeping it closed and pretty hand drawn pictures of (what Adrien assumed were) Kwami on the front. In a decorated oval charm attached to the front was some loopy writing in a language Adrien couldn't understand. It looked almost like water: it kept moving and he couldn't focus on it so he had no clue as to what it could mean, but Tikki apparently did. She shot over to the little book and held her hands over the writing, moving her paws as the text tried to dodge them. 

"Adrien don't look! Don't r-read it! P-Plagg it's the thing!"

"What? What thing, what are you talk-"

Tikki cut off his complaining, sounding more and more frantic, her stutter already kicking in, "N-No, P-Plagg, the **_thing_** , the t-thing... the o-o-original b-bad t-thing."

Somewhere in Plagg's microscopic brain, realisation hit him like a freight train. "Oh no, no no no, who... why? Who put _that_ in a _book_? _Who wrote that book?_ "

Tikki was shaking, pressing down on the book to keep it closed, as if she could make it disappear by sitting on it. Her voice wobbled so it was hard to make out what she was saying, but Plagg had plenty of experience understanding Tikki's panicked gobbledegook. She said, still stuttering and barely making sense, "I d-don't know, it-it d-doesn't say-y, but w-w-we c-can't l-let him r-read about-t i-it, P-Plagg-g. We c-can't!"

She didn't need to say anymore, Plagg understood completely and she was right. Adrien couldn't see what was in that book. If it's contents were as realistic as his memories, that book was a nightmare wrapped in leather and paper. If his charge was to read it, it would change the way he saw him and his kind forever and he couldn't let that happen. 

He couldn't lose Adrien too. 

Tikki's eyes were wide with fear as she gently and carefully lifted the book and hugged it, scared that she'd drop it and it would open on impact. She seemed on the verge of having an airborne panic attack or fainting again, so Adrien, ever the considerate gentlemen, went to pick her up, concern etched onto his face, but she flinched away. 

"Y-You c-can't l-l-look!" She said, her words and volume still jumbling as she tried to calm herself down, "It-t's b-b-bad! D-D-Don't!"

Plagg floated over, anger still swishing his tail. He took her arm, not trying to take the book off her, and led her towards Adrien's pocket, whispering comfortingly. It was bizarre to see Plagg acting so tender, in the same way it was bizarre to see him controlling his temper or snide remarks, but Tikki brought out a side to him that not many got to see: the overprotective brother. Though he didn't fully understand what was happening, Adrien waited patiently until the two of them were settled before silently locking the safe and putting the painting back.

The heist didn't seem so fun now. 

...

Adrien raced back to the room as fast as he could manage without raising suspicion. As soon as he reached his room and shut the door, Tikki scrambled out of the pocket to hide herself somewhere in the second floor bookcase. Plagg sighed. He floated to his charge's shoulder. 

"Lemme guess... you wanna know was that was?"

Adrien raised an eyebrow. Plagg sighed. "Look kid, there's some stuff you just don't wanna know. The contents of that book is one of those things, and before you think about trying to read it, only a Kwami can open a lock like that."

"But Tikki said-"

"I told you before, she's not good with drama. She'll be fine, but nothing she says right now will make much sense. Don't touch the book. It's probably cursed and I can't say how for sure how it would effect you."

He said this with such a somber but final tone that Adrien didn't argue. As much as he wanted to know, he also understood that there were some lines you just didn't cross, so he didn't ask for answers, he just accepted it. He was used to keeping his mouth shut like a good little boy after all. 

Plagg silently nodded at Adrien, lifting off his shoulder to go to the bookcase, where he could hear tiny high pitched sniffles. His expression softened. "Hey, Spots."

Tikki looked up at him and shuffled further between the books to give Plagg some space to sit. He wiped a tear from her eye and gave her a hug, knowing that it'd mean more to her than any pretty words he could try to fumble through. It was peaceful for a minute, the only noise breaking the silence was the occasional sniff from Tikki and, weirdly, it felt as if nothing could hurt them there, between the vintage copies of Vogue. For a second, the both of them could imagine that they hadn't seen years upon years of death and anger and hate, as if they hadn't lived for centuries and experienced _everything_ , as if they hadn't lost anyone to time, to evil or to... other, more sinister means. 

For that one precious second, they could think that they were still innocent children; they were just having a bad dream and they could wake up in the morning and go back to playing, like it had never happened. 

Tikki shuffled and the illusion was broken. Plagg sat back, the air heavy. He cleared his throat awkwardly, "So, uh, how do you know this book has the thing in it?"

"The pictures on the front, we've seen them before. Look." Tikki had set the book down in front of her, still tightly clasped. The various golden Kwami on the front had at first seemed to be dancing and singing, but closer inspection showed that they were writhing in pain, clutching at their throats and screaming. 

Plagg gulped. 

Tikki put a paw on the cover, careful not touching any of the cruel designs, and looked to Plagg for confirmation. He took her other hand and nodded. Turning back to the book, Tikki stared hard at it, her glow burning brighter slowly, the dark space in between the magazines lighting up in red. As the minutes passed, Tikki gripped Plagg's paw tighter and tighter as the strain of trying to undo the spell on the book took its toll. It wasn't easy, age had allowed the spell to gain a greater grip on the book, like rust covering a pipe, and it was taking a lot of Tikki's strength to remove it. 

Gradually, the words began to clear until the loopy writing read, in the oldest language of the Kwami: 'The Beginning of Forever". 

Despite the situation, Plagg snorted. "What kind of a dumb name is that? This book's stupid."

She managed a small smile, which Plagg took as a victory. He watched her take a deep breath and make her glow shine brighter, placing her paw on the oval charm. She hummed the note for 'open' and the clasp rattled. She furrowed her brow and groaned, "It... doesn't... wanna... open!" 

"Need help?" Plagg said, just as the lock clicked and swung open. Tikki shuddered as she relaxed, silently wishing she'd grabbed some more sugar before this. 

Plagg put his paw on her shoulder, "We don't have to do this now, Spots. We can wait." 

She shook her head, "We've been waiting for thousands of years, Plagg. This... this book could have answers, it could have a c-cure-" Wincing at the stutter, she cut off and took another deep breath. She started again, "It could have a cure. I... I saw this book once in His study, I don't know if He wrote it, but He owned it at one point years ago. I know it's unlikely that the solution's in here, but with a powerful seal on it like that... maybe it's _more_. You know He wouldn't have wanted us to find the cure, if there is one, and we both know He wasn't below forcing us to charm objects for His own personal gain."

Plagg could feel the bitterness in her voice. He felt the exact same way. If there was anyone he truly hated in this forsaken hell pit of a world, it was Him. That guy could go choke on His cheese. 

"Besides," Tikki continued, "If we wait, we might never pick it up again." 

She pushed the book so it was sat in between them and Plagg was suddenly struck with the strangeness of the situation. Every stupid decision he'd made in his unfortunately lengthy life had led to this moment: two scared ancient beings hiding in a bookcase staring at a tiny little novel like it could kill them with a word. Maybe it could, but it didn't make the situation any less insane. He almost wanted to laugh, but Tikki would probably slap him, so he bit his lip to stop himself for giggling like a mad cat. He put his paw on the edge of the cover and they both tensed. 

"Now or never, huh?"

"Wow, I've never heard those words before."

"Shut up, you're as frightened as I am, s-stupid."

"Well, I'm not a lucky bug. Any booby traps in this thing are going to head straight for me."

"...I _am_ pretty lucky."

"Yeah... and I'm ugly unlucky. I'm opening it." He flipped the cover over. 

...

Marinette was having the worst day of her life. 

Not only had she tripped twice, lost her bag and once again embarrassed herself in front of the very famous, incredibly handsome Adrien Agreste, she was now certain that she'd accidentally drowned Tikki. 

After searching for hours up and down the river, Mari had found nothing to suggest that Tikki or her bag had even been in the river in the first place. She didn't want to give up searching: if there was one thing Tikki preached above all else, it was that Marinette needed to believe more. Believe in herself, believe in her confidence, believe in Chat; the list went on and on, but it didn't help find Tikki any faster and she was losing the daylight hours. Eventually, after hours of searching, she had no choice but to go home and help her parents pack up the bakery for the day. 

She was the worst superhero ever; who loses their sentient sidekick bug mask? Who _does_ that? Chat Noir would never let her live down if he knew.

As she was rounding up the last of the croissants on to the reject tray, she heard the bakery bell ring as someone walked through the door. "Sorry we're closed- Oh! Alya, hi!"

Her greeting was returned with a distracted wave as her friend nearly tripped her way through the door. Alya was struggling to carry what looked like, at the very least, almost thirteen or fourteen shopping bags, though to give her credit she was trying her hardest to stay upright. There was a moment where Marinette just watched the ridiculous image of her best friend, saddled like a packhorse, trying to fit through a door frame that was clearly too small for the bulk of her purchases before she thought to herself ‘ _I should probably actually help her_ ’. 

Marinette sighed, putting down her pastry tray to go and relieve Alya of some of her burdens. She placed the carrier bags on the counter as Alya fiddled with her phone, which she had immediately pulled out of her pocket the moment her hands were free, as Mari organised herself around the sudden mass of things in the bakery’s entrance.

Alya grinned, slipping her phone back into her pocket, "Oh, thanks! Mari, you won't believe what happened today! So first, I was coming back from my journalism class-"

"Oh, how was that?" Mari murmured as she went back to packing away the pain au chocolat, nudging one of Alya’s paper bags further back on the work space so it wouldn’t fall off.

"It was great, _so_ much fun, I learned tons, but I'll tell you about that later. So, correct me if I'm wrong, but you're missing your bag right? The little pink one?"

Marinette froze, her still hand holding an apple danish tantalisingly close to the reject tray. She felt the blood drain from her face. There was no way- Alya couldn't have- "Y-Yeah? How did you know?"

Alya grinned, "Because I found it on the-"

"You didn't look inside did you?" Mari blurted, already starting to panic.

Alya looked confused. "What? Yeah I did. Why? Was there something important in there?"

Relief washed through her. The danish was placed, carefully and precisely, no need for alarm. Alya hadn't seen Tikki, thank god, her identity was safe; not to mention the two of them had narrowly escaped a four hour interview _at least_ from Ladybug's most dedicated fan. As quickly as the relief had come, however, panic spiked again. If Alya hadn't seen Tikki, then she hadn't been in the bag. 

If she wasn't in the bag, then where was she? 

Marinette asked Alya if she had the little bag with her, trying as hard as she could to channel her inner Ladybug and stay calm. She was definitely not imagining worst case scenarios. She was 1000% calm, no doubt, no doubt.

"Uh, yeah, hang on it's in my satchel." After rummaging around a bit, Alya passed over the spare carrier bag containing Mari's soaked purse, which Marinette wasted no time in ripping apart. "Woah, girl, slow down! What's in there that's so important? Your last shred of sanity?"

She gave Alya a dry look as she pulled the homemade bag open. Sure enough, no Tikki, there was only her phone and some stray cookie mush left. Alya put a hand on her shoulder. "Mari, what's the matter? What was in the bag?"

"It doesn't matter now." Marinette said, trying not to cry, "She's not here."

"Who?"

_Oops._

"Uh, I... bought a ha-hamster?" The excuse sounded lame even to her ears. Alya, the queen of strange looks, looked ready to question Mari without mercy, but she was interrupted by Sabine and Tom walking in from the kitchen to greet her. Marinette had dodged a bullet, but Tikki was still gone, Alya was now suspicious of her new, apparently missing hamster and she still hadn't finished her chores. 

She didn't even want to think about the embarrassing incident with Adrien earlier, she had enough on her plate without debating whether or not her life was practically over or _her life was officially over._

Well, at least it couldn't get any worse. 

...

André Bourgeois had started the day in a good mood. 

He'd enjoyed his favourite french toast and syrup breakfast, despite Chloe's advice that the 'carbs would make him fat', decided on some new healthy eating policies as he left the house, and his favourite sash had been freshly washed and pressed, so that he felt he looked exceedingly dashing, to say the least. By all means, he should've been happy, but unfortunately an upsetting video sent to him by his assistant had soured his otherwise agreeable mood:

" _This is Nadja Chamack reporting. Inside sources from within the Paris head office claim that there is significant evidence that suggests current Mayor of Paris André Bourgeois has been using government funds to purchase gifts for his daughter instead of developing and improving the city. Chloe Bourgeois, the fifteen year old daughter of the mayor, has recently been seen sporting the latest in current fashion couture and suspicions were raised when she arrived at school yesterday in an unreleased Vivienne Westwood ensemble. Sources close to the young Bourgeois claim she'd had her father buy the dress for her as an early birthday present, though insiders claim that this is not the first expensive gift he has bought for her this year. Earlier this year, the young Bourgeois was seen sporting various products from Coco Chanel, Dior and Calvin Klein, amongst other famous designer brands. None of the products in question had been released to the public at the time of Bourgeois’ purchase and rumours of Bourgeois using political persuasion for personal presents is on the rise amongst opposition and the electorate. Is this blatant misuse of political power harmful to Paris? Many believe so, and there has been an outcry on social media for further scrutiny amongst Bourgeois' party, as people feel that their tax money should be better spent by the governing body. Some have even gone so far as to say that Bourgeois' parenting is not only harmful for his daughter, but sets a bad example to single parents and young parents struggling with difficult children across the country. As an influential figure, Bourgeois' behaviour is always in the spotlight, as is his daughter's, and many believe his poor parental skills could lead to an increase in parental issues across Paris. More on this story at eight._ "

Andre clenched his fists and ground his teeth. Him? A bad parent? 

He raised his darling Chloe from a toddler by himself and look at her! Beautiful, popular, ambitious; she was the perfect daughter. So what if he got her an expensive gift or two now and again? She deserved the very best! Besides, it wasn't like he was the first father to dote on his daughter. This Nadja Chamack had no right to criticise his parenting, she was a mother herself wasn't she? As far as he knew, the child had even been Akumatised; some parenting that was! 

How dare she suggest he wasn't a good father? _How dare she?_

A black butterfly flew through the gap in the car window and into his sash.

"Perfect Candidate. My name is Hawkmoth and I have a deal for you..."


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Duusu's awake (kinda), Mari loves her Kwami and Alya tries not to throw up out of her window

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi! this chapter has been finished for a long time, but other works caught up with me and it kept getting pushed back on the to-do list, but now its finally here!  
> some quick notes: I started this fic before season 2 was released, just before the Bee and Peacock Kwami were revealed and based on Duusu's design I assumed she was male and wrote her as such; I have now changed all her pronouns to female and y'all can feel free to assume she's trans in this work, though I doubt that there'll be much focus on that in the actual fic  
> I've also gone through the chapters I've already uploaded and I've edited them, as I felt that some weren't up to my usual standard, and I added some extra details that might be relevant later, so here's a heads up  
> also, I may also ignore some aspects of canon later on, such as Andre's upcoming Akuma form, and elements of the Kwami's origin that Thomas has promised to explore later in the show, as I have my own ideas specifically for this story that I've already planned out so stay tuned folks its gunna get Angsty  
> if anyone has any questions about this AU or has found any grammar errors (cos my god there were so many) feel free to send me a message on here or on my tumblr: tizzytinkertilly

"Wait."

Plagg caught himself just before opening the book, the cover only just lifted off the pages.

Tikki looked at him guiltily, "We forgot about Duusu. She deserves to see this as much as we do."

Plagg smacked his face with a groan and dropped the book cover. It was looking like the damn thing was never going to be opened. "Great, of course bird brain messes this up. I'll go get her, hold on." 

He shuffled out of the gap and flew down to Adrien while Tikki took a deep breath and tried not to hyperventilate. After a quick conversation with Adrien, Plagg flew back up holding Duusu's broach, struggling to stay aloft. "Tikki!" He wheezed, "Can we just... oof... free her down here?"

Tikki flew over quickly, fussing for a moment before grabbing the other side of the badge and clicking her tongue. "Plagg, you should have just said it was too heavy, why didn't you leave it and fly up here? Then you wouldn't have strained yourself!"

Plagg just scowled. Together, they lowered the badge to a quiet corner of Adrien's room and perched it against the wall. Flopping onto the floor Plagg muttered, "Maybe we should get your Ladybug to take us to Fu now. It'll be easier to release her with that crusty old fart here." Plagg tapped the gem embedded in the metal, scrunching up his face when there was no response from within, not even a sparkle. The miraculous might as well be a normal broach. He looked at Tikki with concern. "If the feather butt is even in there."

"Plagg, just use their names, it's only Adrien and I here."

"Fine. If Wayzz was here, we could eject Duusu out of her stupid trinket quicker."

Tikki winked, allowing herself a little smile, "There we go! But, no, we're not getting Mar- Ladybug to take us to Fu. I'm still not sure where my holder actually is, not to mention I don't want your Chat Noir getting any clues towards who she really is, not yet at least.” She glanced at her sister’s unresponsive miraculous. "We have to do this ourselves, Plagg."

The Kwami of Destruction swore under his breath but agreed. It wasn't like they hadn't done this before. He doubted Adrien could take a full on identity reveal so suddenly anyway. The boy would probably explode and, and funny as that would be to watch, Plagg still needed him... as a sidekick obviously. It was a tragedy really that the confines of his morals wouldn't allow him any real medieval fun. Watching destruction was one of his favourite past times after all.

He quietly waited until Tikki had gone and replenished her energy with another lightly burnt cookie from the desk before he grabbed some Camembert from his other secret stash under Adrien’s bed, and flew back. He watched her, once she finished her snack, quietly place their sister’s miraculous on the floor, allowing some space between herself and Plagg. She'd drawn a beautifully complicated magic circle under it using her glow, making faint singe marks on the floor. Without the aid of a confinement box, it would extremely difficult to release their sister, but Tikki and Plagg not only had a lot of experience freeing their siblings, they were also the most powerful of their brood.

How lucky.

They placed their paws in the circle, lighting up the outlines. While Tikki's side of the circle stayed red, Plagg's trademark black began to leak into the drawing until it was half and half, like ying and yang. They waited until they had cleared their minds and took deep breaths.

Simultaneously, they began the incantation in their native tongue, starting quietly and gradually increasing in volume, though to human ears it sounded more like a song than a chant. The language of the Kwami was mostly lost to time, but the few Kwami that remained still spoke it, especially amongst themselves. It was a beautiful, inimitable way to speak and the Kwami treasured it as one of the few fragile links to their past. 

To Adrien, who was sitting at his desk below them, it felt like he was invading on a personal moment as the words, or notes rather, seemed melancholic, like they were telling a sad story or recounting a loss. It made him want to cry for things he hadn't lost, and for pain he could never understand. Not for the first time, he felt sorry for his Kwami in a lonely way he couldn’t quite comprehend.

The Peacock miraculous began to rattle as it bounced around the inner circle. The sapphire gemstone embedded in the centre began to glow blue, the light growing brighter and more solid as the song continued. 

There was something wrong, however. 

The light, which was slowly being drawn out of the sapphire, looked as if it was fighting to stay inside, clawing desperately as the chant pulled its body away from the stone. Tikki looked up from her paws to give Plagg a concerned look, one that was mirrored on his face. The glow of the circle suddenly turned harsh as the blue light turned fully solid and Duusu was finally ripped from her broach. The miraculous fell to the ground with a clatter.

The song was finished and their sister was free. The room felt cold.

As the magic circle quietly faded away, it left behind a faint dust outline that Plagg swished away with his tail as he walked over to his sister, Tikki trailing nervously behind him.

Duusu was not moving. Her eyes were closed and her arms lay still at her sides, even her tail feathers were frozen in place a few millimetres off the ground.

"Uhh, Spots?" Plagg walked tentatively around Duusu as if inspecting her, "Isn't she usually squawking about something by now?"

Tikki's brow furrowed in confusion. Plagg was right, Duusu was nothing if not overdramatic. Anything even the tiniest bit emotional would set her off, and this situation would be no exception... but there were no tears, no excitement, not even a twitch. She was still and silent. It was unnerving to see someone usually so animated, so morose. Tikki moved to put a hand on her sister’s forehead murmuring under her breath, "She looks a little off colour, maybe she's sick?"

Before Tikki could touch her, Duusu suddenly shot backwards, fixed in the same pose, but moving all the same. Only her tail feathers moved, fluttering as she floated away sharply. Plagg and Tikki jumped back in surprise. Duusu stopped a little way away, immediately becoming still and statuesque again.

"Yeah, OK, there's definitely something wrong with her. But what do we do?" Tikki said, trying not to fidget, "I've never seen anything like this before... w-what if we can't fix it?"

Plagg frowned, "Well, we can't do anything about it now. It's late, you've used up too much energy today- you _have_ , don't give me that look- and I want to sleep, because unlike _some_ Kwami I still need it."

Tikki pouted, but she knew he was right. "So what do we do about Duusu's... uh... condition?" She said, gesturing towards their frozen sibling, "We can't just leave her there!”

“Eh, she’ll be fine. Probably.”

“Plagg! She could be seen!"

Plagg thought about it for a minute. After a while his eyes lit up and his signature manic grin spread across his face. "Well... we _do_ have a perfectly good quantum lock up there..."

...

"Now!"

Tikki tentatively waved her paw in front of Duusu's face. Instantly, the Peacock Kwami shot backwards, slowing to a stop just as Adrien slammed the shoebox over her. Carefully, Adrien slid the lid under the box, making sure the blue Kwami didn't escape, and flipped it over. He quickly slotted the Peacock miraculous in there too, holding it between his fingers with a tissue, just as Tikki and Plagg had instructed. Tikki then flew over to slide the little Kwami-sized book under the lid as well.

As Adrien gently placed the box onto the bed, Plagg flew down and slammed the lock on the lid. He hummed an entrapment curse and black, smoky chains shot from the oval charm to bind the box. It was the most ominous Adidas shoebox Adrien had ever seen, but it did the job. Plagg shuddered as he removed his paw from the lock.

"Right, so I put a little destructive curse on it. It's not that powerful, so worse it'll cause is balding or something, but I suggest only Adrien and I touch it until we can figure out what to do with the bird brain."

Adrien blinked, "It won't hurt me?"

"You wield destruction energy all the time, don't you?"

He couldn't argue with that, so Adrien picked up the box and slid it under his bed, but he still looked worried. "Plagg?" He asked.

"What?"

"What if someone comes in here to clean?"

"Adrien, you know full well you don't spend enough meaningful time in here to make a mess."

"...Fair enough."

Tiki clapped her paws, drawing the boys' attention, "Well, on that note it's now time for some meaningful sleepy time! Where is OK for me to...?"

Adrien blinked. He hadn't even considered where Tikki would be sleeping, though not because he was being inconsiderate, but because there had been so much going on that day the thought had completely evaded him. Guilt washed over him, the irritation that he hadn't thought of her comfort pulling at his conscience. If Nathalie knew he'd treated a guest like that, she'd have skinned him where he stood.

"It's fine, she can sleep in the socks with me." Plagg yawned as he settled into a particularly cheesy smelling ankle sock, "There's enough room and I've never been seen, so it should be fine."

"Plagg, you blend in. Most of those socks are black. You're completely camouflaged!" Tikki huffed as she tried to cross her arms to limited success.

Plagg snorted. "Guess you'll need some luck or something to keep you hidden, won't you?"

Tikki shot her brother a look but she wriggled into a matching sock next to him without further complaint. "Haha, very funny. Now go to sleep so I don't have to hear your annoying voice anymore, kitty cat."

"Whatever, Spots. You sound like you've been inhaling helium non-stop for the past century. If anyone's annoying, it's you."

"W-Well, your voice is so scratchy, it's like you ate a cheese grater instead of the cheese! You're definitely stupid enough to do something like that! Ha!"

"Oh really? Well you-"

"Could you both be quiet? As glad as I am that you're reunited, I would really like to sleep."

"Oh! Sorry, Adrien! We'll be quiet."

"Oops."

"Goodnight, Tikki, Plagg."

"Goodnight Adrien! Sweet dreams!"

"Night, kid. Happy nightmares."

...

Marinette woke from a dreamless sleep with a start.

Tikki! Tikki. Tikki... wasn't here.

It felt wrong. It was as if her whole room has lost its light, everything looked dim and miserable without a glowing red blob darting around and giggling, and Marinette's mood immediately dropped at the realisation she had no real leads to finding her. For all she knew, her little ladybug friend was at the bottom of a river spitting bubbles. Maybe she could convince her Mum that there was a good reason to go scuba diving in La Seine? School project maybe? A sudden interest in suburban water pollution?

With a sigh, Marinette got herself up to get ready for the day. It was a Sunday, so technically her Dad didn't need to open up shop, but as per usual, his boundless compassion had led him to keep his boulangerie-patisserie open for the morning so that the occasional weary tourist or desperate local could still get their hands on his top quality homemade bread.

However, this did mean that Marinette was forced to work the cashier at six thirty in the morning, which was less lovely.

Usually, she could barely keep her eyes open, but today the stress of losing her favourite bug was keeping her awake. She hadn't slept well last night either. How could she sleep when she didn’t know if Tikki was safe? After hours of tossing and turning, she'd gotten up to stress-sew herself some mittens and a matching scarf out of old scraps before she'd eventually passed out around half three... or had it been four?

Either way, it didn't really matter to her when Tikki was still gone and she wasn't doing anything to fix it. She couldn't just leave the shop either, as Ladybug she had learned that taking responsibility was incredibly important, but she was just itching to check everywhere she'd gone the day before again, just in case: the stretch of La Seine where she'd last seen Tikki, all the local confectionary shops (including the hiding places in her family's own bakery), the school, the park, her bedroom and around the Eiffel Tower. She and Tikki went there all the time, so there was a slim chance that she could have been there. Unfortunately, there had been too many tourists to go up it the day before, but maybe today she could convince Cat Noir to take her up there for a look?

With a jolt, Marinette suddenly realised she didn't have a way to contact him either. Without her yoyo, she didn't have his number and because of the stupid identity secrecy thing she had no idea where he would or could be either. Inwardly, a voice reminded her that of the two of them, she had always been the more determined of the Parisian duo in keeping their identities under lock and key. She told that voice to shut up and let her be irrational.

Maybe she could catch Chat on his patrol? But then how would she convince him to take her up the tower without revealing her identity? She could say she'd left something up there, but knowing the chivalrous cat, he'd go up to look for it himself without her. He'd definitely call her his 'Princess' again too. Sometimes, she really didn't understand that Chaton's ridiculous nicknames; Marinette certainly didn't feel like a princess, stood in her flour covered apron and full of frustrated sadness. Most princesses had people to fix their problems. Marinette just had herself and her sewing kit left at her disposal, which wasn't really that much help.

She sighed as she methodically unlocked the till and moved to flip the CLOSED sign on the door to OPEN. Who knew that one little ladybug could be so much trouble? Though, if Marinette was honest, she didn't mind the trouble. She just wanted her friend back. She missed her more than anything.

It should have scared her, how quickly Tikki had become such an irreplaceable part of her life, but really it was a nice, warm feeling to know that her and Tikki were alike enough to become so close, so fast. It was all the more reason for Marinette to find her as soon as she could.

The door chimed as the first customer walked in, a stressed looking man with a briefcase. From behind the till, Marinette called, already switching into retail mode, "Hello! Welcome! Can I help you with anything?"

She only had to last until eleven thirty. Five hours, that was all.

She could do it.

She could do anything for Tikki.

...

Alya was annoyed. More so than she had probably ever been before. Not only had her younger sisters ruined her brand new bullet journal with a juice spillage before she'd had a chance to even _start_ it, now Marinette was lying to her.

She'd gone to the bakery to be nice and return her friend's gross, sopping wet bag the day before, which _technically_ she didn't have to do right away, but she had, because she was a good friend, and now Mari was lying about some hamster she'd apparently gone and bought?

It just wasn't believable.

Sabine wouldn't allow any kind of rodents near the bakery, no matter how cute or domestic they were or how much her crazy daughter loved them, and Marinette wasn't disobedient enough to just go out and buy one on her own. Besides, that girl spent all her pocket money on fabric anyway, she didn't have the funds for a hamster, or anything else that went with it.

How was Marinette expecting to hide a whole hamster tank in her room? She couldn't sneak something that big past her parents. Not only that, Marinette wouldn't have left her best friend and partner-in-crime Alya out of that kind of stressful, heist-like situation! Nope, no, it was too ridiculous, even for Mari, which obviously meant she was lying, but _why_?

Alya couldn't help but feel hurt that her best friend was lying to her, but then everyone had their secrets. It was perfectly plausible that Marinette had had designs in her purse that she didn't want Alya to see. There were many pages in her sketch book that Mari hadn't let Alya look at yet and, in a moment of panic, Marinette could have told the hamster lie as a cover up for losing her designs.

Alya respected that. As a reporter, she wouldn't give away the first chance at presenting a story to the masses, and she knew Marinette was a little jumpy still after Chloe and Sabrina stole her hat design, so to lose her sketches would be traumatic.

However, Marinette's exact words had been 'she's not here', emphasis on the 'she'. 'She' suggested a person, an animal, something endeared enough to Marinette for her to treat it like it was a person and worry about it obsessively. Marinette, despite the way she was, wasn't _that_ crazy about her sketch book.

So what was going on? Mari might have made another Akuma doll, but then why wouldn't she show Alya? Sure, she'd said the Lady Wifi one was creepy that one time, but she hadn't _meant_ it! She'd actually thought it was kinda cool, y'know, if it was kept a hundred feet away from her at all times and never, ever shown to her ever again.

Maybe it was just an old hamster toy or something from her childhood and she was just embarrassed about it? It wouldn't be the first time Marinette had freaked out over something so silly. It didn't make it less annoying though. Plus, Alya considered their friendship close enough for her to already know about all of Marinette's childhood toys. Though saying that, they weren’t hard to miss: the giant pink cat Marinette had on her bed was an obvious one, and her friend wasn’t exactly the tidiest person either.

Frustrated, Alya sat down hard at her desk, immediately picking up a pencil to chew on. Didn't Mari trust her? She had to know that Alya accepted all her quirks no matter what, right? Fake hamster or not, she always had her friend’s back.

Surely, she knew that.

She definitely knew that.

Alya paused her chewing. It wouldn't hurt to check though.

She reached for her phone to absolutely _not_ call Marinette, when she heard a scream from outside her window. Without hesitation, she jumped out of her chair and rushed to look.

Outside, people were screaming in terror as an Akuma the size of a building floated past, zapping people as it went. Alya's mouth dropped open at the sight of the massive villain.

It truly was huge, everything about it said 'I'm big and I'm important'. Different fake awards decorated its sash, stuff like 'Best Parent There Ever Was Ever', 'Father Of The Best Daughter', ‘Coolest Politician’ and 'Nicest Sash'. It's suit was clearly bespoke, well fit and dark navy blue, though in the right light it looked blacker than night, and it's shoes that were hovering slightly off the ground were well made and flattering, suggesting this Akuma cared about appearances. A bright dazzling smile seemed to be permanently stuck on its porcelain-esque face, though as it turned Alya could see the grin was floating separate from the Akuma’s face. Somehow, that wasn't comforting, it was much more unnerving, like a clown in any given scenario. At closer inspection, the Akuma could be seen to have a huge bright, shiny badge pinned to the highest corner of the sash that said 'I Am The _Perfect Candidate_ ' in big, professional letters.

In conclusion, this Akuma clearly wanted to make a solid impression, though whether that was one meant to scare children or encourage the people to vote, Alya couldn't tell.

Her eyes were draw to one of the Akuma's massive hands. In the middle of each palm, there were target patterned badges imbedded deep in the skin. One said 'You Should Vote For PC!', the other said 'Because You Have No Choice!'.

' _How cheerful_." Alya thought to herself with more than a hint of bitterness, ' _Good to know political dictatorships are still alive and well in the twenty first century, I guess_.'

Slowly, the Akuma raised its left hand, pointing the badge at a young lady cowering behind a car. Alya went to shout a warning, but it was too late as a beam shot from the circle design and hit the lady point blank in the chest. She screamed and in a flash of light she reappeared... as Chloe Bourgeois. Alya barely restrained a gasp, so it came out as more of a choking noise.

The Chloe clone blew a kiss to the Akuma and smiled. Alya couldn't make out what she said, the girl was too far away, but from what Alya could glean from her lip reading skills, the poor girl said something like ' _I know you can win, Daddy! You're the best father ever!_ '.

Alya paled and felt herself go to throw up, but she fumbled behind her for her phone anyway. A good reporter always got the scoop, no matter how scary (or, in fact, _truly horrifying_ ) things got. Clearly the Akuma was the Mayor, and it was up to her to warn the masses that hadn't yet noticed. She sent a quick message or two to Marinette as well, just in case the Akuma came her way.

Hopefully, she could warn Ladybug and Chat Noir of the impending Bourgeois apocalypse too.

...

"Plagg!" Tikki hissed at the lumpy sock she could only assume was her brother, "Get up!"

There was no reply from the sock.

"Plagg!"

There was still no reply.

"Plagg! _Wake up!_ "

"Hmmm?" said the lumpy sock as it wiggled itself into a more comfy position, "No, it's too early."

"There's an Akuma!"

Plagg's eyes shot open. Poking his head out of his sock sleeping bag, his focus darted around the room for a moment as he registered where he was, eventually resting on a very concerned looking Tikki.

Plagg gave her a look, "How do you know?"

"I saw it, out the window." Tikki babbled quickly, wringing her paws, "It had a badge calling itself 'Perfect Candidate', so I think it might be the mayor or a member of his opposition? It's destroying buildings and attacking people and I'm worried my chosen might get hurt, we need to hurry!"

Plagg nodded in understanding, reaching out gently to stop his sister from pulling her skin off. "Right, OK. I'll go get Adrien, you go eat the last of those cookies, get your energy up."

He dived suddenly under the socks and returned with an armful of Camembert that he’d hidden before he went to bed, just in case. "She'll be fine Tikki. She's strong, your girl."

Tikki looked down, suddenly morose, "So were-"

Plagg stopped her before she could continue, grasping her shoulder with his free paw, "Yes, they were, and not all of them had bad endings. She won't either. It's not the time to think about that now Spots."

Though she still looked like she wanted to cry her eyes out, Tikki bit her lip and nodded. Quickly, she floated over to the desk to munch on the final few chocolate chip cookies. At the same time, Plagg downed the cheese in one go, zipped across the room and shot into the bathroom, phasing his way through the door. He gave Adrien the fright of his life (' _Get over yourself Agreste, I've been alive for centuries, you really think I haven't seen a naked human before?_ '), but the boy sobered up when he heard about the Akuma.

"What do we do about Ladybug? She can't purify the butterfly without Tikki."

Of course his first thought was of his bug. Plagg was almost proud. He considered his options. The obvious idea was to bring Tikki with them to fight the Akuma. If she tried hard enough she could purify one butterfly on her own, but it would take a lot out of her and there was the possibility that Hawk Moth might see her, putting them all in even greater danger. If Hawk Moth figured out that Ladybug was just a lady without her bug, it could become a big problem.

"We might have to let Tikki find her chosen herself while we fight." Plagg murmured, "It’s dangerous for Tikki to fight alone and we can't risk you and her Ladyship seeing each other’s faces before you're ready."

Adrien frowned. Plagg could already tell what his chosen was thinking before he said it out loud. “I’m ready, and I’ll do whatever I can for my Lady when she needs me.” Plagg suppressed a smirk. He’d heard that one before. Adrien pulled on a shirt, his voice muffled through the fabric. “Besides, whether Tikki’s in the fight directly or not, it’s still dangerous, Plagg. What if Tikki gets lost again? Then none of us will know where to find her!”

“Hmm.” The boy was right. There weren’t many other options, seeing as they couldn’t leave her here in the mansion. Tikki may have been one of the fastest Kwami he knew, but somehow he figured that wouldn’t be enough if she remained in the house. Still, he’d have to come up with something on the fly so Lady Luck didn’t have her identity revealed by an overexcited teenage model. Plagg sighed, “Fine, we’ll just have to keep her safe until Ladybug turns up and collects her.”

Plagg didn’t miss the way Adrien’s eyes lit up, and inside he groaned. Adrien Agreste had to be one of his worst kittens when it came to catching the love bug, mentally he made a note to address that later, but for now, they had bigger fish to fry than Adrien’s spotted sweetheart. He nodded at Adrien, almost impatiently. “Can we go?”

“Plagg, transform me!”

Cat Noir burst out of the bathroom, startling Tikki, who he scooped up into his hand as he turned, jumped and climbed out of the window, baton already extended as he soared over the Parisian buildings outside.

“Ahh! Chat? Please don’t just grab me like that, you nearly caught my tail!” Tikki patted her butt frantically, checking for injury. She sighed in relief; still three tails total, no appendages lost.

Cat Noir looked down her with immediate worry, “Oh god, I’m so sorry, are you alright? I was just trying to leave quick-"

She waved off his concern, “No, no! It’s alright! I was mostly just surprised.” She looked him up and down, humming to herself, “Um, do you mind if I try to hide in your hair? There wasn’t much room in your pocket before, and if you’re going to be moving about a lot, I’d like to not be squished? I don’t think there’s anywhere else to hide in your suit either, except the bell.”

“Oh, sure, that’s fine!” He stopped for a second on a flat roof to lift his hand up to his messy mop of blond hair. Tikki floated above his head for a second before tucking herself in next to one of Chat’s leather-like ears, covering herself with blond waves in an attempt to hide her vivid colouring.

“Comfy?”

“Yes, I’m good!”

“OK, I’m gunna start moving now, hold on! Keep a look out for Ladybug, alright?”

Tikki nodded, before she realised he couldn’t see her, “Oh, right, yes I will!”

Chat Noir, to his credit, tried to keep his head as still as possible as he bounded across the roofs of Paris, but Tikki still felt like she was holding on for dear life. She clutched desperately to the fake ear, silently begging Plagg to keep the magic there intact. 

It was not a comfortable ride. Still, she’d been subject to worse.

As Chat ran towards the very obvious bulking figure of the Akuma, Tikki followed Chat’s recommendation and kept her eye out for Marinette. The whole journey there she looked, eyes flitting around frantically, but she couldn’t see her holder anywhere, though she did spot Alya leaning out a window with her phone in her hand, apparently trying to film Chloe Bourgeois for whatever reason. Though it had confused more than frightened her, the scene had left a bad taste in her mouth. 

Something was definitely very, very wrong.

Tikki peeked out over Adrien’s golden hair and caught another glimpse of the massive Akuma storming through Paris. She felt her blood run cold as the Akuma’s unnatural detached grin shone over the terrified masses. Not for the first time, Tikki worried for her charge’s safety. 

She had to find Marinette as soon as possible, or there was no telling what could come next.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha the situation seems p r e t t y bad doesn't it, here's to hoping you don't have to wait another year to see what happens


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> whoops there's political demon ruining people’s lives and for once its not Trump

“Goodbye! Come again!”

Marinette waved to her fourth customer of the day as he left the bakery. She smiled to herself as she packed away the tray; apparently he was off to give his grandmother a surprise visit at the hospital, now complete with a few freshly baked almond croissants to cheer her up. It was a refreshing sentiment, especially after the stress of the past day or so.

Dusting the flour off of her apron, Mari risked a glance at the clock on the wall. She groaned: dead on 8:00 o’clock. There was still another three and a half hours to go before she was allowed to leave. 

Marinette sighed. At this rate she was never going to find Tikki.

Seeing as there were no customers in the shop, Marinette decided she deserved a short break and walked into the back in search of her phone, giving her Dad a quick hug as she passed by. She grabbed it from the charger and tapped her foot impatiently as she waited for it to turn back on, absentmindedly fiddling with the charger chord. 

In the meantime, she tried to think of some kind of concrete plan to find Tikki. Her first idea, to look in places the Kwami was familiar in the hopes that Tikki would somehow be there, hadn’t worked out so well the day before, but it didn’t hurt to try again. This time, however, she’d hide little notes with directions on how to get home, just in case Tikki did find her way there. 

There was always the chance that Tikki was safe and she had just gotten lost. Marinette couldn’t give up on that. Paris was a big confusing city after all, it was very easy for someone to lose their way. 

Her likely-to-be-less-successful back up plans were a Hansel and Gretel cookie trail, a bunch of homemade ‘Missing Pet’ posters, and a Batman-style stop light shaped like a Ladybug. 

If those failed, she’d have no choice but to go to Chat, try and come up with some convoluted reason as to why she needed his help and go from there. It was risky, and she could end up revealing herself if she wasn’t careful. Hopefully, it wouldn’t come to that, but it was good to know she had a last resort available... just in case. 

A little jingle played as the phone screen lit up and Mari turned back to it in response. Almost instantly she was bombarded with messages from Alya. 

**(07:03) From Alya ✨✨**

_morning ‘Nette!! Hope you had good nights sleeeeeeeppppppp_

**(07:03) From Alya ✨✨**

_i got up early to do the science project due tomorrow, have you started it?? it’s gonna take forever it’s like 7 pages_

**(07:09) From Alya ✨✨**

_i’m going to take the silence as a resounding no_

**(07:09) From Alya ✨✨**

_if it makes u feel better, I’m barely past page 1 this thing is hard_

**(07:10) From Alya ✨✨**

_like idk what a covalent bond is and I honestly don’t care_

**(07:10) From Alya ✨✨**

_unless it gives me super powers_

**(07:10) From Alya ✨✨**

_which according to this txtbook it doesn’t so I’m back to not giving a damn_

**(07:11) From Alya ✨✨**

_in the meantime, wanna tell me about this mysterious hamster of yours yet?? hmmmmmmm???_

**(07:17) From Alya ✨✨**

_mARRINNETTEE_

**(07:17) From Alya ✨✨**

_FORGET THE PROJECT_

**(07:17) From Alya ✨✨**

_FORGET THE HHAMSTER_

**(07:17) From Alya ✨✨**

_FORGET THE CONCAVE BONDS_

**(07:18) From Alya ✨✨**

_THERES AN AKUMA ANDDITS HUGE AND ITS TURNING OPEOPLE INTO CHLOEE_

**(07:18) From Alya ✨✨**

_I THINK IT MIGHT B BE THE SCARIEST ONE YET JUST BECAUSE OF THAT_

**(07:19) From Alya ✨✨**

_Image: lookatthechloes.png_

**(07:19) From Alya ✨✨**

_I THINK ITS HHEADING TOWARDS THE TELEVISION STUDIOS IMN GOING AFTER IT_

**(07:21) From Alya ✨✨**

_Image: thisakumaisbiggerthanmydreams.png_

**(07:21) From Alya ✨✨**

_ILL KEEP MY BLOGG FPOSTED STAY TUNED GURL_

 

Marinette stared at her phone, eyes wide. An Akuma? Now? 

The attack couldn’t have happened at a worse time. Ladybug was, for the most part, out of commission, so there was no one to purify the Akuma, no one to fix everything at the end... but no one would know that. People could get hurt without their hero to protect them; Cat Noir could only do so much on his own. Images flashed through her head: screaming citizens as they ran from the victim-turned-villain, her partner backed into a corner with no one to help him, Hawk Moth cackling as his Akuma reached for Chat’s ring— 

Marinette slapped a hand across her mouth to hold back a horrified sob. The people would think she’d abandoned them. 

She couldn’t - no she _wouldn’t_ \- let anyone suffer because of her mistake. She had to go, risky or not. 

“Mama!” She called as she ran up the stairs, quickly shoving her phone in her pocket, “ _Mama!_ ”

There was a shout from somewhere above her, but she couldn’t make out what was being said, so she ran faster. Grabbing the banister to pull herself around, she shot forward, taking each step three at time. She sprinted through the door, catching her mother by surprise. 

“Marinette? Shouldn’t you be downstairs, honey? What’s wrong?”  


Marinette took a breath, quickly rushing through her words, “Alya! Alya needs me there’s an Ak- emergency! There’s an emergency! I need to go help right now, right away!”

Sabine gasped, “Oh dear, OK, you go, go now, do you need anything to take with you? Some medicine or some notes? What kind of emergency is this? Take some pastries from downstairs as well, just in case.” She rushed about the kitchen, grabbing some first aid supplies and snacks, habitually putting them in her daughter’s backpack as the daughter in question caught her breath.

“It’s an emergency-emergency!” Marinette said, gratefully taking her stocked up bag from her mother, “Thank you, Mama! I’ll be back as quick as I can!”

“OK, sweetie! I’ll tell your father where you’ve gone, stay safe!”  


Marinette slung her backpack over over shoulder and slid down the bannisters, ignoring the spark of guilt and shoving her way through the door as soon as she reached the bottom. She checked her phone as she started to run. Alya’s blog had a video of the Akuma already posted and Marinette clicked it in her haste, fingers shaking. 

" _Don’t click away, cos we are live from Paris! Alya here, bringing you the one and only Ladyblog! I’m live-blogging from the ground, giving you exclusive footage of Hawk Moth’s latest supervillain! No Ladybug on the scene yet, and early reports confirm only glimpses of Chat Noir, but I do have an exclusive visual on this week’s Akuma. This one calls itself ‘Perfect Candidate’, I think. Naturally, I deduced this using my amazing and awe inspiring journalistic talents... and also because it says so on one of those massive badges up there. As far as I can tell, it’s on its way to the television studi-oooh my god! Woah! It’s super strong! I hope Ladybug gets here quick, that building needs to be fixed really soon and oh- right! Back to the Akuma. As you can see, Chloe Bourgeois appears to be a focus of this Akuma, judging by the clones all over the city, so best guess the victim is our Mayor of Paris, Mr Andre Bourgeois— but is there more to this Akuma than meets the eye? What does it really want? I’m going to find out! Huge scoop to come!_ ”

The video cut off there, freezing on a picture of Alya’s excited face. 

Marinette felt her blood run cold. The Akuma had torn through that building like it was tissue paper, like it was only _air_. There could’ve been people in there, people she hadn’t saved in time. Marinette didn’t know anyone who lived there personally, but that didn’t mean anything in the moment. Those houses were homes, and homes held people, her city's people.

The people she was letting down.

The thought made her want to throw up. 

Mari wouldn’t let herself panic, though she could tell she was nearing on a nervous break down. It took a long of her strength to force herself to clench her fists, steel her resolve and start running towards the studios. She tried not to think on how scared she was without her suit. Instead she concentrated on a coming up with a plan. 

The people needed her. Alya needed her. Chat needed her. She wouldn’t just give up. Tikki had taught her better than that, and with any luck, she’d be able to find Tikki before she got to the Akuma. 

Marinette held back her tears. No crying on the battlefield. 

...

“Hey, Tikki?”  
“Yes?”  
“Did you spot her yet?”  
“No, not yet, I’m sorry.”  
“OK, keep looking. I could really do with her heeeeEEEEEeeelp right about now!”

Chat said as he dodged another massive arm swing, using his baton to quickly pivot around a building and tuck himself behind a chimney. Hidden from sight, he looked around for a better place to think of a plan, suddenly very aware he was practically on his own without a red spotted lady beside him. He had to be careful, watch his own back. Ladybug wouldn’t be there to knock him out of the way if he got too close to a stray fist, so focus was key. 

It was more than a little unnerving being without his partner, but he’d made an effort to stay on task. For the most part, he’d managed crowd control: grabbing civilians before they could be shot with the badge-ray, knocking cars and buses out of the Akuma’s path, trying to divert it to the least populated areas, all while trying to keep in contact with the police. He’d avoided as many questions about Ladybug’s absence as he could, but he could tell that people were tense. Only one of two superheroes turning up to fight such a big Akuma wasn’t a great boost to morale, and people had definitely noticed she was missing. It wasn’t helping Chat’s focus. 

In the meantime, while he was moving members of the public, Chat waited for Tikki to find her charge, which was proving more difficult than the two of them had originally thought. Apparently, his Lady was no where to be seen, which worried him more than he cared to admit. He couldn’t even imagine what Tikki must be feeling.

They’d been up against the Akuma for over fifteen minutes, nearing on twenty. If she didn’t arrive soon (though Tikki was _absolutely certain_ she would), then something bad might have happened to her. She never took longer than ten minutes to start saving the day, though Chat factored in some extra time knowing she’d be arriving as a civilian. 

He didn’t say it out loud, but the sudden thought that she could be injured made him feel more than a little panicked, borderline hysterical. He couldn’t do this without her, and he didn’t want to do this without her either. 

They were partners. 

Chat shook his head, blinking hard. No time for that now. He had to concentrate. 

With Tikki acting as look-out, the two of them had followed the Akuma through Paris’ streets, trying to avoid direct confrontation so that he had time to work out what the Akuma wanted. Tikki had already identified the victim as the Mayor; that much was clear by the dozens of Chloe look-a-likes milling about the streets, but he still wasn’t sure what the Akuma was actually trying to accomplish. So far, all it had done was shoot bystanders and move through Paris very, very slowly, occasionally knocking down a building or two. 

From his experience with The Pharoah and Darkblade, he could only assume that Chloe-fying the population wasn’t the only goal Perfect Candidate had in mind, so all he had to do was figure that out, stop the Akuma before it could go through with it, and then he was golden. The only problem was what to do afterwards. He couldn’t purify the butterfly with Cataclysm and without Ladybug’s miraculous on hand the purifying power of the Ladybug yo-yo was just as unusable. 

He went to ask Tikki for ideas when he heard a faint crumbling noise from behind the chimney. He froze, his cat ears twitching towards the sound.

A split second before the chimney shattered into dust, Chat jumped out of the way, Tikki’s high-pitched shrieking echoing in his ear. He landed roughly on a roof across the road, scraping his boots against the tiles, cursing under his breath. 

“So-” Chat muttered under his breath, “-you can move fast when you want to, huh? Good to know.”

The Akuma didn’t seem to hear him. It was looking at its palm in confusion, as if it had expected to see a crumpled kitten laying there instead of shattered brickwork. It clenched and unclenched it’s fist, turning the rubble into sand. 

Taking the opportunity to flip himself over the victim without being seen, Chat landed in an alley nearby (the fourth one in two days). He pressed his back against the wall of a news agents, peering around the corner to keep an eye on Perfect Candidate’s movements. 

When the Akuma seemed calm for a moment, still confused over the magically disappearing Chat Noir, Chat took a second to consider his options. He could try to lead the victim away from the centre of Paris, but if he wasn’t careful that could just cause more damage to the surrounding buildings, and without knowing whether or not there were people inside, it was an unnecessary risk to take. Plus, the added ‘no Ladybug’ problem meant there was no guarantee he’d be able fix the damage anyway, so more broken infrastructure wouldn’t do anyone any good. The local council would have a fit. 

His second option would be to continue what he was already doing and follow the Akuma to wherever it was going, but that was taking too long. Besides, ideally, he would have to get there before the victim to prevent whatever unfortunate thing they were planning. Without the prior knowledge, this wasn’t exactly a viable choice either. If someone got hurt because of that decision, and he couldn’t reverse it, he’d never forgive himself. 

His other option would be to ignore the Akuma completely and focus entirely on the search for Ladybug. Part of him wanted to jump straight into looking, a desperate hope that he’d meet her as a civilian still present in the back of his mind, but rationally he knew that it would take the longest out of all the options. 

Not only did he not know what Ladybug looked like without her mask, Tikki wouldn’t give him any definitive details. She was determined to protect her charge’s identity, which, though sweet, was making it really difficult to pinpoint a place or person to look for. To top that all off, he didn’t even know if the things he knew about his Lady’s appearance, her blue eyes and dark hair for example, were even the same as they were when she was Ladybug. His eyes as Chat certainly didn’t look the same; how was he supposed to know if her eyes were really that gorgeous shade of cerulean blue? 

He could only hope. 

Above him, he could see Perfect Candidate looking around, still trying to figure out where the superhero had gone. Luckily, Chat was just out of his line of sight, so the hero let himself relax a little. He credited his sudden burst of good luck to Tikki. Plagg would’ve thought it was funny if he’d been smacked all the way to England by some rogue Akuma. Probably would’ve asked for British cheese too, the little dairy-loving mini demon he was. 

Inevitably, there was only one option left: try and defeat the Akuma now, but as a plan it still had its issues. How did he figure out which badge was the one with the butterfly in it? What if none of the badges had the butterfly in it? What did he do with the butterfly once he found it? Could he even catch it? Was it safe to touch with his hands or would he be possessed too? Could the butterfly steal his ring by itself? How would he even get close to the Akuma without Lucky Charm? What did he do once he used Cataclysm? There was no back up coming to pick up the slack once his timer ran out, and after that he’d be stuck. 

Of course his biggest problem was actually purifying the butterfly. Without his partner, the best he could do would be to contain it, though he wasn’t exactly sure how he was supposed to do that. Could an Akuma possess a glass jar?

He pondered silently, tapped his foot against the pavement. Luck wasn’t going to do him much good without the actual Lady Luck herself around, though he was grateful for Tikki at the very least. He could tell she was trying her best to help, influencing little things here and there, but she couldn’t do much by herself; her good fortune wasn’t all powerful. 

As if on cue, a familiar jingle played, signalling the breaking news. Chat felt himself tense again as Perfect Candidate swung his ballooned body around to stare at the large TV strapped to the front of the news agents. The opening credits ran and Nadja Chamack suddenly appeared on screen, looking concerned as she fiddled with her cue cards. 

" _Don’t be bemused, it’s just the news! This is Nadja Chamack reporting. Once again, citizens flee as supervillain Hawk Moth’s latest Akuma victim terrorises the city of Paris. The victim’s motive is, as of yet, unknown, however civilians are encouraged to stay inside as the Aku-_ “

Perfect Candidate’s plastic smile spun upside down, clicking loudly, the sound eerily like forceful twists of a child-proof cap. 

“Adrien! Move!” Tikki squeaked, and Chat ducked and rolled to another alley just in time to watch in horror as a massive blue fist sunk into the little shop, completely demolishing it and its neighbours. Sparks flew from the smashed television. Shards of glass littered the street. A layer of brick dust and shredded newspapers covered the ground, flapping feebly. The glitched image of Nadja Chamack managed to repeat a garbled ‘stay inside’ one more time before it was met again by a giant, angry fist. 

Once the TV was certainly broken, and it had been hit a few more times after for good measure, Perfect Candidate’s frown swung back round, slow clicks punctuating the return of the clown-like grin. 

Chat stared blankly at the broken news agent, suddenly very aware of the threat Perfect Candidate posed. He had to get to the television studios, immediately. 

Nadja Chamack’s life was in danger. 

...

Alya was living in a nightmare. 

Since she’d left her house, she’d been met by Bourgeois upon Bourgeois upon Bourgeois. All of a sudden, it was a blonde here, a blonde there, hundreds of bitchy remarks everywhere. Streets were filled with yellow jackets, striped tops, sneers and smirks, and Alya had had enough of it. 

It was like a plague of designer jeans and abandonment issues. 

At one point, she’d run past a very confused and scared Sabrina, who had been surrounded by several Chloes all demanding different things from her. It didn’t look friendly, and the poor girl looked like she was going to cry, so desperate to please all of them. Alya had moved to help her, but Sabrina ran before she got a chance, followed by at least twenty copies of her so-called-best-friend still screaming frivolous commands. 

Unfortunately, that wasn’t even the worst of it. From what she’d seen so far, ‘Chloegeddon’ was in full swing. Every street was coated with Chloe. Every corner, bridge, every cafe and park was covered with Chloe. Even the route she needed to take to get to the studios was rife with Chloe Bourgeois look-a-likes, each one admiring their reflection or checking their nails. 

Alya had to wonder why the Akuma would want to spread Chloe copies around— parent or not, surely even Andre had to admit Chloe was a creature of pure evil. 

The Akuma itself was still gleefully causing the Bourgeois epidemic, and was big enough that Alya could still see it from blocks away. However, if she wanted to reach it for an interview, she still had a trail of primadonna daughters to wade through if she wanted her story. Plus, the Akuma was getting further and further away; that thing could move surprisingly fast when it wanted to. She had to get moving, but there was a one big problem that was preventing her. 

The Chloes almost seemed to be multiplying. There really were a lot of them, enough to fill an average sized army. They were blocking several main streets and traffic had stopped dead still: tons of abandoned cars littered the streets. 

Alya couldn’t go around the Chloe army, and she didn’t have a way to go over the Chloe army; so she had no choice but to go through the Chloe army.

Alya really didn’t want to go through the Chloe army. 

“Ugh.” A Chloe to her left said as she ran past, “Those jeans are so ugly. Where did you buy them? Off of a homeless person?”

Several other Chloe’s laughed in unison, a high pitched chorus of white privilege and custom lip gloss. Alya held back a bitter retort. She had a scoop to get to and no fake Chloe was going to ruin that for her... even if she wanted to slap a couple of them around the face while she had the chance. She sprinted down the street, ignoring the various snide comments thrown her way. 

“Your dye job looks horrendous. Did you dip your hair in the sewers?”

“Oh my god, that phone is so old. Is it a loan? You borrow it from your great-grandparents or something?”

“You know tartan went out of style with the cowboys, right? You got a hoedown later or what?”

“The fifties called, they want their glasses back nerd!”

“High tops? I’m sorry, what year is it again? I thought we passed the millennium.”

“I hope you realise my Daddy is going to hear about this travesty.” With a start, Alya realised the same Chloe from before was following her. Gritting her teeth, she tried to get rid of the clone by cutting down some side alleys and darting through short cuts, but no dice; this Chloe was persistent. “He’s going to call the fashion police on you and your ugly jeans.” 

Alya narrowed her eyes. This Chloe didn’t seem any different from the rest. She was dressed in her typical designer clothing, her trademark yellow jacket perfectly tailored as always, nothing particularly striking. She was refusing to leave off with the insults, but she was the only one who had decided to follow. The rest of the clones simply stood in the same place they’d been shot, taking selfies or loudly complaining. Apparently all the running from various Akuma had kept Chloe fit however, as she was keeping up with Alya’s pace without much effort. If anything, she was faster. 

“There isn’t a fashion police.” Alya spat through gritted teeth. “That’s not a real thing, now leave me alone.”

The copy smiled. “Oh, it might not be a real thing right now, but after Daddy sees how tacky your outfit, it will be. It’s practically criminal!”

Another uproar of cackling from the surrounding Chloes. The Chloe following Alya grinned, holding a haute hand to her face. “See! _I_ agree with me!”

“Hmm. So _this_ is what Hell is like.” Alya muttered, grabbing a lamp post to spin herself around the corner. “And there I was, planning a good day like a fool.”

“Hmm? Doubt it could’ve been better than this. Spending time with me is more special than any lame thing you could’ve been doing anyway.” The persistent Chloe noted, somehow inspecting her cuticles while running. Alya rolled her eyes, pressing her palms to her eyes. Just being around Chloe was giving her a headache. 

“God, it’s like regular you bumped up to a hundred. It’s horrible.” Alya stopped, having lost sight of the Akuma in her haste. She made a ‘shoo-shoo’ motion at the clone. “Go away already, I’ve got reporting to do and I’m sure you’ve got someone else to harass.”

The Chloe looked offended. She crossed her arms and stared angrily at Alya. “How dare you! My Daddy is the Mayor! You think you can just-“

Alya stamped her foot, impatient and frustrated, and turned to yell at the look-a-like, “I get it! Your Dad runs Paris! We _know_! It’s all you ever talk about! Can you shut up about it for one _minute_ please!”

“No!” The clone stamped her foot as well, chin raised in defiance, “You _will_ listen to me! You should be more like my Daddy, _he_ listens to everything I say, because he knows I always have really smart and important things to tell him! I’m sorry you only have boring news to talk about, you sorry excuse for a report-“

Alya held up a hand. “Wait, shut up. What did you say?”

“I said that you should listen to me because-“

“No, no after that.” She clicked her fingers, trying to remember, “Something... your Dad! He listens to you no matter what, right?”

The fake Chloe looked confused. “Yes, of course, becau-“

“Perfect! If I can find the _real_ Chloe, convince her to talk to the Akuma until Ladybug gets here, then I might be able to buy them some time! Great! Thanks fake Chloe, bye!”

“I’m not fake! Everything I wear is 100% designer!”

Alya raced away, ignoring the indignant cries of the angered Bourgeois, who huffed and turned away to sulk. The scoop was all coming together now, and a chance to help Ladybug defeat an Akuma? It was like a dream come true. 

What could be better?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> haha I call this chapter 'the calm before the storm' so get ready for some Fresh Fine Hell y'all its coming soon I hope

**Author's Note:**

> come find me at tizzytinkertilly on tumblr if you wanna say hi and cry over cartoons with me ;3


End file.
